Author: Matthew Jarosz

Journal 2

  1. I was familiar with the binary system discussed in this article, Challenging Binary Systems and Structures of Difference through researching ecriture feminine. The binary traditionally operates with one side of the binary being secondary to the other, and this “lesser half” is often considered “female”, as in male/female. This quote further explains,”This, she believes, is why women have long been the oppressed sex; the nature of binary thought ensures that nothing can be privileged without something else being marginalized”(Palumbo 147). The binary enforces a limited perspective that serves to subordinate women and other marginalized identities.  The binary extends to sexual attraction, as it reinforces a binary with straight/gay, where being gay is the negative or the feminine. The article brings up laws against gay men or lesbians due to homophobia, which is an outcrop of subterranean social beliefs that serve to perpetuate 2. heteronormativity(Kang).In the article, Karen Martin noticed that from a young age men and women are assumed to be straight(Kang), and there is a confirmation bias in the way parents assume the behavior of their children corresponds with heterosexuality(Kang). There we see how heteronormativity is inculcated from a young age. Also, we find everywhere this “ideal” of marriage between a man and a woman. It is evident in endless advertisements we see on tv and in magazines. 3. With the binary and heteronormativity, we find this obvious social construction of standards that are so ubiquitous that we might overlook them. In the instance of race, as this article discusses, there is a perception perpetuated due to skin color that creates numerous difficulties for minorities. A friend of mine who is black recently complained of struggling to find a new apartment, and how he often was asked to perform a credit check, whereas I, a white person, was not.  The history of,”…undue impoverishment of Blacks and the undue enrichment of whites during slavery and decades of unequal laws and blocked access to employment opportunities (Feagin 2006)(Kang), is not considered. Instead people expect black people to be bad with finances, and so entirely responsible for their own poverty. Again, we find a binary of white/black, with black being secondary, like women are considered secondary to men. If you look at all these binaries I have presented: male/female, straight/gay, white/black you can connect the ideal of straight/male/white, and also female/gay/black. The experiences of marginalized individuals are interconnected, so we see an intersectionality, an overlap, but in order to connect we must think outside a binary. If we see identity:male, gay, black, as merely constituted by it’s opposite, we fail to notice how we experience multiple identities simultaneously,”as matrices of difference”(Kang). Limiting our identity limits our expression, it limits the ways in which we view the world. To be more inclusive, more understanding, we can’t simply see the world in terms of a black and white binary.

Works Cited

Palumbo, Allison. “Finding the Feminine: Rethinking Henry Miller’s Tropics Trilogy.(Tropic of Cancer, Tropic of Capricorn, and Black Spring)(Critical Essay).” Nexus: The International Henry Miller Journal, vol. 7, 2010, p. 145.

Kang, Miliann, et al. “Unit II: Challenging Binary Systems and Constructions of Difference.” Introduction to Women Gender Sexuality Studies, 

University of Massachusetts Amherst Libraries, 30 June 2017, openbooks.library.umass.edu/introwgss/part/test-subpart-a/.

Matthew Jarosz Discussion 1

Hi. My name is Matthew Jarosz. My major is Gender and Women’s Studies. I work as a cook while attending school. I am in the process of transitioning but the pandemic has both facilitated and halted that, paradoxically. Ideally my name would be Deany, a name I developed while writing a book years ago. There was a boy inspired by Hippolite from The Idiot by Dostoyevsky.  Then there was a couple, and the girl was named Deany. I found that character very interesting but difficult to write as I wasn’t quite sure how to write as a woman without being stereotypical. Being presented with that situation led me to a thorough examination of what I feel it means to be a woman. My upbringing was in a very hyper-masculine setting so I do not choose to fault myself for the limits of my understanding. Of course that act of forgiveness was arrived at over time.

I really loved everyone of these videos. I felt a special relationship to the instances where eating disorders were discussed. Such as in Disappearing and Reappearing Act, You Did It Girl,  and I also found myself relating to this ideal of beauty discussed in Eczema. With the latter I just felt deeply affected by the idea that society creates this ideal which you can never uphold as you are not considered ideal due to race. This was an interesting example where racism and sexism overlap. In the other videos on eating disorders, I noticed how the two women received compliments for being skinny. In You Did It Girl, the woman said ,”compliments fed her.” In my experience, I was not really encouraged, my own motivation was more internal, owing to an ideal that did not exist, but rather I hoped to create.

My gender story is maybe a bit unusual. I want to focus on my struggles with eating disorders. I remember as a child I was given undue attention by my family. I then became very judgmental of my appearance based on the affections I would receive in regards to them. I suppose in some facet there was a lack of warmth that gravitated me toward this. I think I was given perhaps a false perception of who I was, as in all honesty I can’t look back and say I was anything but average. Anyway I always struggled with looks, owing in part to a glasses prescription that I refused to wear, so in the mirror I would see myself as being much bigger than I was. I remember feeling with my friends that I was never good enough to deserve their company based on my looks. I always felt like I was failing to achieve an ideal that would necessitate acceptance. Of course I saw this ideal as reflective of a masculine “cool” rather than a feminine ideal of beauty, but I believe we can draw parallels. At around 16 a close friend decided to end our relationship due to my image. Prior to this I only had weird quirks where I would fidget in the car constantly to not gain weight, but I didn’t really care too much about being fat. Then suddenly I was obsessed with weight loss following the loss of my best friend. I would starve myself, and rather than purge, as I didn’t know how, I would run very far distances after every meal. It was horrifying to feel out of control of your life: I remember my mother and parents watching in horror as I binged by emptying out the cabinets to eat everything, after I had already run seven miles, and then I cried as I knew I ate too much so I would have to run again. I was starving myself to where I could barely socialize as my thoughts were consumed with food. I wanted to be as skinny as I possibly could be. The following quote  from the article was lost on me at this point in my life, “Your identity is your sense of self or how you define yourself”(Murphy 12). I had no identity, I had no one I wanted to become, my gender was eradicated: I only wanted to be skinny. I think a loss of gender definition is a gender story.

In the article they discussed frequently how individuals try to appeal to others according to gender,“Social learning theory says you learned to be who you are by observing others, imitating them, and being rewarded or punished for certain behaviors”(Murphy 13). For either gender there are certain expectations which must be manipulated in order to present yourself as uniquely self-defined. In the beginning you always attempt to appeal by matching those around you, then later, sometimes, you decide you don’t agree with these prescribed behaviors. There were examples of individuals who were homosexual who felt trapped in their situation and so they were considering suicide. They did not agree with their situation but felt helpless to use agency to change it. I think it’s interesting to consider how gender can feel like something you must conform to based on the examples given in the article where individuals were rebuked for stepping outside the common parameters of their gender. We saw that in the video Be A Man also, as this man was told that he should not be cooking  and instead the “girl”  should be the only one cooking. In this instance a man was confronted for doing something that was not considered masculine. 

I appreciated how the article gave us different examples of reframing a situation just to elaborate the idea. Reframing is ,“Reframing  means shifting perspectives so that you view a situation from a different vantage point”( Murphy 21). There were numerous instances in this article where choosing to see reality from a different perspective enabled one to accept their gender. This is interesting, but I see this possibility where the validity of someone’s experience may be called into question based on this limitless possibility of reframing a situation. At what point do we accept problems related to our gender if we operate under the assumption that someone outside our life can always argue for a different perspective? Does reframing ask us to accept a bad situation and then adjust to it? I worry that reframing can lead one to question their perception even when they are in the right, in all situations related to gender. 

 

Journal 1

It’s necessary to understand that gender often reflects cultural perceptions that have been reinforced over time. This article discussed how we come to accept our gender through an active consideration of conforming to it.  1. An important concept was the social construction of gender. This refers to how gender is not determined by biology, but by how our social environment dictates our representation of gender. 2. Another important concept was identity, how we choose to view our self. The question of whether we have any agency in controlling our identity was discussed in the article. We have some degree of control, in choosing our clothing, hair style, etc. but we cannot necessarily exert agency over the way others then perceive us. So it’s important to see things from a perspective that aligns with our interests as opposed to seeing our identity from the perspective of someone else. 3. Reframing is a  crucial concept to how we view our identity. We have the option of viewing our situation from a certain perspective that may appear to reflect reality, but we can also see our situation from other perspectives that are equally realistic. Through reframing, we have the option of escaping a negative situation by choosing to interpret it differently. This article spoke at length about how we are not limited to our circumstances, which is also to say we are not defined by our gender. Perceptions related to gender identities are constantly in flux, changing as either gender makes the conscious decision to defy expectations. Culture often reinforces a status quo in regards to our identity, enabling us by supporting normalcy and decrying rebellion. If we do not behave as we appear, conforming to the definitions of either gender, we often experience conflict. This was evident in the example of public transport being denied due to one’s gender appearance not matching their gender as identified on an ID. This article brought up the shifting perceptions of individuals as genders defy the expected categorization. It provided hope that there is the opportunity for individuals to change what they do not like related to their gender identity by exercising personal agency. Throughout the article there were examples of conflicts related to individual identity, such as the conflicts of a married couple who were struggling to fairly allocate chores. Their problems related entirely to how they perceived their responsibilities per their gender, and the man was attempting to compensate by doing more as stereotypically men do less household chores. Another example was a gay man who was attempting to dress in a way that more stereotypically emphasized his homosexuality, and how this led to conflict from others. In each of these instances, it was almost as if the two individuals entered into a double-bind, as if they did nothing to change their situation, they would still likely encounter consequences for conforming to an identity they do not agree with. To clarify, if the man did not take on extra chores in the relationship, he would then possibly be seen as a stereotypical male who relies on a woman to complete chores, and if the gay individual did not express his orientation clealry, he would feel an internal conflict, as he would be concealing his true identity. I thought it was interesting that in this article a woman was brought up who was suggested to be a lesbian despite appearing overtly feminine. I wonder if embracing an irony in the case of a woman is something that is en vogue, or perhaps the history of women being seen as mysterious compels others to inquire into her identity. There is no similar analog in terms of men, as they do not really have a history of being seen as mysterious, so perhaps men have to overtly display their orientation. It leads me to a question posed by an article I read recently, where a female to male transgender individual commented on how she felt as a man. This is the quote, “What continues to strike me is the significant reduction in friendliness and kindness now extended to me in public spaces. It now feels as though I am on my own: No one, outside of family and close friends, is paying any attention to my well-being”(Bahrampour). This is something I often wonder about as a man, do I experience apathy due to my gender, and is this anything valid to complain about, if on the other hand women experience constant unsolicited attention? I honestly feel very uncomfortable positing that I experience some sort of unique displeasure as a man, due to privilege, and due to what men always do, ruin things. They have created these men’s rights groups and other groups that are just utter jokes, and it’s always a possible that you will fall under their umbrella if you present a question of the negatives related to the male experience.

 

 

 

Works Cited

Bahrampour, Tara. “Crossing the Divide.” Https://Www.washingtonpost.com/, 20 July 2018, www.washingtonpost.com/news/local/wp/2018/07/20/feature/crossing-the-divide-do-men-really-have-it-easier-these-transgender-guys-found-the-truth-was-more-complex/.