I was brought up in a typical Hispanic family, with both parents and two siblings; however, I feel that my family was more of a conventional one, where certain things, and tasks were obviously reserved for men while others were meant for women. For instance, my father was seen as the breadwinner and my mother as the homemaker. While both parents were actively involved in family matters, I mostly viewed each one of them based on their respective roles, authority and the differences which they had. Looking at this, I believe that the manner in which my family is structured is partly responsible for the development of my unique gender identity, right from childhood. Also, I believe that since none of us had a choice on how our genders will turn out to be, the society needs to understand that being male or female is all about the social forces involved in identifying with a certain gender (Foss et.al, 5). With todays’ civilization, it’s unfair to still use societal stereotypes that have been constantly passed from one generation to the other to determine one’s gender. Instead, people need to understand that gender can be constructed through factors such as race and social class, and still influence the experiences and expectations of someone.
Thanks to my educational exposure, I am in a better position to understand the subject of gender formation. For instance, I now realize that some of the experiences which I had as a child were clearly meant to help me understand myself. It is funny but I remember my mother telling me things like; ‘Stop crying, and be a man!’ but I always thought that she was teasing me; however, I Recently realized that such words were not just a consolation, but they were meant to indirectly communicate something to me-a man is not expected behave that way. Then when I look at how some girls my age were treated whenever they hurt themselves, I realize that how people see themselves is clearly dependent on their experiences as children (psychological theory). For instance, people grow up observing how girls were reserved to do certain things while boys were to do the other things (Social learning). They include how to walk, the clothes to wear, the sports to associate with, how to talk, how to sit, the movies to watch or even the music to listen to. In short, it’s not always about the biological characteristics; it’s also about the cultural and social factors that affect how one’s gender is constructed.
Personally, I never got to understand that gender is not always about being male or female till I was all grown. The subject of gender binary is something that most parents have failed to educate their children while they are growing up. When it comes to sexuality, people should be free to say they fall under the ‘others’ because they do not identify with being male or female. Still, children need to be exposed as early as possible to enhance their sexual orientation in a way that they can grow up feeling comfortable with themselves (Foss et.al, 12). Through the same exposure, children can perceive gender and sexuality in the most appropriate ways. Apart from that, the theories of gender/sex also have an impact on how a person can identify with a certain gender, including justifying the features that they have. For example, theories help people understand that one is either born male or female; they go through different experiences that trigger internal development and based on their culture, their genders are viewed quite differently. Even with that, I feel that in order to create a better world, children should be raised knowing that being male or female does not restrict one to behave in a certain way.
Works Cited
Foss, Sonja K., Mary E. Domenico, and Karen A. Foss. Gender stories: Negotiating identity in a binary world. Waveland Press, 2012. pp. 1-29
Sue, Derald Wing. Microaggressions in everyday life: Race, gender, and sexual orientation. John Wiley & Sons, 2010.
The marriage institution allows for a platform to analyze the subject of gender. When it comes to marriages, therefore, most people prefer making it official through a sacred ceremony and special ritual commonly referred to as a ‘wedding’. The religious wedding ceremony is an artifact that has existed within us for decades, probably one that often illustrates the meaning of sexual relationships and behaviors among humans. Nonetheless, while the manner in which religious wedding ceremonies are conducted has dramatically changed over the years, they still offer the opportunity for people to reflect on the topic of gender in general. For instance, this is a ceremony where both men and women play different roles; they put on different attires and they are each expected to behave in a certain manner. When one looks at gender, in reference to anything, it does not always mean just the women, it also means looking at how different things are done out of the experience of being a man or a woman (Kang 11). For instance, in a gay wedding ceremony couples of the same sex who play quite the same roles; they put on almost the same attires and they are assumed to be the ‘same’ since they are of the same sex. When one looks at gender in reference to such weddings, it does not always mean being a man or a woman, it also means looking at how different things are done out of the experience of being a man or a woman (Kang 11). In that light, this essay provides a sexed/gendered analysis of the ‘religious wedding ceremony’ as an institutional artifact. Applying gender lens to the artifact of the religious wedding ceremony illustrates that men and women are socially accustomed to occupy dissimilar roles, expectations and challenges that allow them to be treated differently thereby creating biases, barriers and indifferences, lessons that people can learn when it comes to redefining gender roles
The artifact and its context
A religious wedding ceremony is an artifact that remains quite symbolic for different people and regions across the world. Traditionally, it was said to be a ceremony that was more of a spiritual celebration meant to bring the people together as a symbol of sharing life forever. For such a ceremony to happen, the couple must not just be strong in faith and religion, they are also required to enroll in pre-marital counseling and attend services occasionally before the actual wedding day. Usually, such weddings are associated with artifacts such as a white wedding dress, music, an album, vows and flowers. The selection and meaning of these particular artifacts in any typical religious wedding make the event appear quite sacred for those involved. In such a wedding ceremony, the couple is also expected to say the ‘Till Death Do us Apart’ wedding vows, exchange rings, unify the event, sign a marriage license, declare that they are officially married and then head out to the reception. So, during the entire time from the ceremony to the reception, a religious wedding is one that is fully governed by certain traditional customs that are often handed down from generation to generation.
For gay couples, a wedding ceremony as an artifact remains quite symbolic for different people and regions across the world. Same-sex ceremonies often come up with different ways to change what the crowd thinks when it comes to a traditional ceremony. Such ceremonies do not always do things the same way as opposite-sex couples’ wedding, particularly when it comes to walking down the aisle, choice of song, speeches, labels and displaying affection to the crowd. Whereas there are those who think that planning such a wedding can be reasonably difficult, this is one ceremony that always turns out to be beautiful right from the procession to the reception.
How the artifact helps understand the aspect of gender
While attending a religious ceremony, irrespective of whether it is a gay wedding or one between a man and a woman, it is easy to notice how certain things that actually happen in the event reflect on the aspect of gender. Traditionally, weddings between a man and a woman were said to be highly-gendered when it comes to the expectations and roles played by both genders. For instance, when it comes to stereotypical gender roles, the bride is expected to wear a white dress, carry a bouquet of flower and take her husband’s name, while the man is expected to wear a suit and ask the bride’s father’s permission (DeFrancisco et.al, 133). These practices have grown tremendously, and are now very common among people; this is so, that they tend to be assumed as very important and necessary in the ceremony. It is true that there are alternatives to most of these conservative wedding artifacts, ones which people need to consider. For instance, while the white dress might currently be a standard artifact, it was just introduced by Queen Victoria back in the 19th century and does not have to be a norm. Customarily, the bride is expected to wear white as a symbol of purity and innocence on her wedding day, a color that may not necessarily portray who they are. Then there is also the aspect of handing off the bride to the groom by her father that often happens in conventional weddings till date. Men often find it respectful to acquire the bride’s father’s blessings before legalizing the marriage, but others would rather view it as an outdated practice that needs to stop. Interestingly, the same weddings are said to be the ‘bride’s day’ as though the man is not to be fully involved or honored as much as the woman.
On the other hand, in a gay wedding the ceremony portrays the values of the couple, including who they are. This makes same-sex wedding ceremonies different; not just because they are based on the couple’s creativity, but also because they lack a specific guideline to be adhered to. Whether it is a lesbian or a gay ceremony, there are a number of ways in which the couple may decide to walk down the aisle. For example, the couple may walk together, one partner may do it first then the other follows or the couple can have more than one aisle. So, with the gay-wedding ceremony, who walks down the aisle, who waits for the other or who makes the speech may not necessarily matter.
By viewing the artifact of religious wedding ceremony using the aspect of gender, I realize that most of the things which happen in weddings remain intensely gendered. Arguably, weddings are good, but they tend to portray different genders in a certain way. For instance, feminists would argue that certain traditions need to be done away with, to reduce the many barriers that are created in the process. Through the traditional wedding gown, a woman is restricted to wear white on ‘her day’ even though it does not reflect on her personality. Still, the same woman is handed over from her father to her husband as though she is a burden or property (Foss 16). While the other traditions such as the standing ovation and the ‘first look’ appear to be moderately harmless in wedding ceremonies, they often paint women as ‘romantic’ objects that need to be admired by everyone. While looking at the crowd, they want to attend weddings to witness how beautiful the bride is or how the groom stares at her or to know who catches the bouquet and garter. As a result, I hold that the religious wedding ceremony is an artifact that implies that there is only one way of saying ‘I do’ and that it is the only wedding custom that religious people should adhere to. Some practices and artifacts are sweet, others are mystifying, yet others are just bizarre. Thanks to same-sex weddings, a lot has changed ever since they were legalized. These ceremonies have taught the world that gender roles can be re-defined, and that it is not always about ‘who the bride is’ and ‘who the groom is’.
The gendered nature of a religious wedding often portrays itself even before the wedding day, usually through the proposal that is mostly done by the man. More gender distinctions begin to reveal themselves throughout the planning process and on the day of the wedding. A couple of examples make it easy to comprehend that religious weddings are full of gendered practices and traditions that often promote the continuity of gender inequality and sexism. It is the perceptions that people have towards masculinity and femininity that determine the roles that both men and women play within weddings. When certain things such as throwing the bouquet or the bride walking down the aisle are omitted from the wedding, then it is seen as less traditional. In other words, a religious wedding ceremony is an artifact that illustrates that gender inequality is propagated through the presence of gender unequal roles, sexism, stereotypical beliefs and the gender differences linked to certain wedding practices.
Works Cited
DeFrancisco, Victoria Pruin, Catherine Helen Palczewski, and Danielle E. McGeough. Gender in communication: A critical introduction. SAGE Publications, Inc., 2014. Pp.129-137
Foss, Sonja K., Mary E. Domenico, and Karen A. Foss. Gender stories: Negotiating identity in a binary world. Waveland Press, 2012. pp. 1-29
Kang, Miliann, et al. Introduction to women, gender, sexuality studies. Amherst, MA: University of Massachusetts Amherst Libraries, 2017. pp. 9-42
If you think about it, no matter who you are or where you come from, we all have privileges even within our own culture. Privileges is a specific right, advantage, or immunity given or available only to a particular person or group. Don’t get me wrong; I am not saying that it is not an issue; some people have more privilege than others. Privileges have caused unfair moments in history that has even impacted the lives of many in a very negative way. To get more into detail, let me explain with this example. For example, I could be considered privilege if I, as a Dominican man, attend a Dominican restaurant, and the service I get is better than a white male that attend. That’s not always the case, but it can happen. I personally had experience that situation where I was treated better than other. That is something I can consider as my privilege. Another example is a white male who could be considered a privilege if he attends Harvard University vs. a Hispanic male. This example demonstrates how two people from different groups could have privileges on different occasions. Furthermore, to tap into it, the more in-depth compound privilege could have a tremendous impact on social groups. For example, the minorities groups especially, the black community has been oppressed for many years causing a gap of inequality; That is why on our demographic and data we see how there is a lot of black people who are uneducated, and not able to sustain a “good life”.
I also experienced micro-aggregation because I am a man and sometimes, I help out my mother with the house shores. My cousins always made fun of that, they said “that’s for girls man. Or aren’t you supposed to be the man of the house?” I always tried to help out around the house because I know that gender does not limit people to help out and still be useful. Stereotypes always play big roles in this situation’s, it is our job to break those ignorant thoughts.
After reading “Identity Terms” the term that most describes me is “Latino,” “Latin American,” “Latina,” “Latino/a,” “Latin@,” “Latinx,” “Chicano,” “Xicano,” “Chicana,” “Chicano/a,” “Chican@,” “Chicanx,” “Mexican American,” “Hispanic.” I arrived in the U.S from the Dominican Republic when I was seven years old. I immediately saw how my identity completely change; Back in the Dominican Republic, our population is not as diverse as the U.S, and coming to the U.S completely change the way I perceive my identity and others. Here in the U.S, my identity went not only from being a Dominican but being Hispanic or Latino; That what people call me. These were terms that I was not exposed back in the Dominican Republic. Also, experience a lot of people confusing my country of origin, saying are you Mexican, Colombian, and sometimes even white. I remember people saying, “you don’t look Dominican because Dominican are of dark complexion; Are you Puerto Rican?”. That’s when I realize that Americans had an stereotypical way of identifying individuals base on how they look.
One of the theories in the “Feminist Philosophy of Language” was “ 2.5 Generics” it really caught my attention. For example “Generic statements are ones such as “cats are furry”, or “a cat has fur”, which are neither universal generalizations (there are furless cats) nor existential generalization (the claim being made is clearly stronger)”. This demonstrate that we as individuals speculate or even categorize individuals or things creating an illusion that because humans have hair all human need to have hair. This exclude those that does not have hair is creating the illusion that everyone need to have hair and if you don’t there is something wrong with you.
Reading the article was eye-opening, and it helped me understand a few of my behavior and how other people think and perceive sex and gender. In society, the programing of sex begins even before a baby is born, you see parents say things like if I have a boy, he will be treated like a king or if it is a girl she will be treated like a queen. This picture the mindset that immediately is created when we think of a specific sex, and we start to quickly attach the different ways we should be treating a human base on sex. Don’t get me wrong is not like we are not supposed to be handling it differently; it is how some people or cultures treat human base on sex. Attaching different stereotypes; Is like society creates particular requirements of how a male or female should be perceived or treated.
Now, as society focuses more on studying gender and sex, we have come to understand better that it is okay to identify as a man or a woman, depending on how you see yourself as. Self-identity is very important, rather than how society perceives you. In the first chapter of the reading, it talks about transgender. According to the article, a transgender person is a person born of a specific sex and grows older to discover that they feel like the opposite sex. When this happens, the person chooses to operate and physically become how they feel inside. For example, I met a woman who was born a man but identified as a woman and decided to replace most of her body parts to look like one. Now her transgender boyfriend is pregnant. This concludes that identity is developed within ourselves.
Furthermore, some cultures dress and tell their kids that a boy has to dress like a man, with hats, dark neutral colors, that pink is for girls and blue for boys. Yet those are standers and requirements created by society and is delivered by how we communicate. In reality, what you wear does not define who you are or your gender. As the community continues to study gender and communication, we can continue to progress and have a better understanding of human sexuality and gender.
