My culture and background had a huge impact on my gender identity. I am a black middle class woman, born and raised in Jamaica. I am a cisgendered heterosexual woman. Being Jamaican I was sheltered from the idea that there could be other genders outside of male and female. When sexuality is spoken about in my country anything that is not heterosexual is looked down upon. Growing up around Christians I was taught that homosexuality is a sin. Even around non Christians they I found that they would cite the Bible as an excuse to be homophobic. Coming to America was an important way for me to unlearn these harmful rhetoric.
My first learning experience was meeting a gay person in middle school. We became friends and I was able to ask as many questions as I needed and I learned so much. My assumptions were quickly disproven and I was able to become open and accepted. What was really sad was that although I saw that homosexuals were becoming more accepted transphobia wasn’t as easily accepted. I soon learned to be an ally to all members of the LGBT+ community. I used resources such as social media to learn more about these marginalized groups and accept them for who they are.
Growing up Caribbean there were gender roles placed on me from such a young age that I couldn’t handle. I was expected to know how to cook and clean. My family preferred that I spent more time inside than outside. I was told that it wasn’t ladylike for wearing pants to church or to sit with my legs open. I remember an elderly woman in Jamaica telling me it was a sin for a girl to whistle. A lot of these things really bothered me as a child especially seeing the boys in my family get the freedom to really express themselves. Even during school I experienced this hardship. I was very outspoken and liked to talk a lot a a child and I was often punished for it because it isn’t ladylike. As I grew older I started to rebel against these stereotypes until my parents finally saw how unfair these expectations were.
I believe that a number of things contribute to ones gender identity. How they grow up and the culture they see around them can influence this. One thing that I strongly believe that someone should be able to express themselves however they choose to. I hope we get to the point where society accepts everyone for who they are. I plan to continue to learn and teach others around me so they can unlearn their ignorance and accept people for who they truly are.
