Srijana Bhandari_Gender Identity Project Draft

Gender Interpretation

Today, people decide the gender of a baby even before they are born. When we ask what gender is to people, there will be the same answer of either of two sexes, male and female. But is it true? What is the gender of a person who likes both pink and blue, or the one who loves both Barbie dolls and toy guns? Binary gender is a classification of two distinct genders, male and female. It has been the most significant issue, especially now when people deny following the social construct and move on to find themselves.
I was born into a huge family. With five sisters, including me and only one brother, anyone can imagine the importance of him, the only male bloodline after my father. Son or male bloodline was very important in my country; a son was someone who can send their parents to heaven; someone who runs the home. Among all the other sisters, I was always considered a different one—someone who doesn’t like to follow the social norms. The social norm, in this case, was gender as a social construct. The social construct of gender is the theory of the cultural origin of masculine and feminine character in people. Mostly girls are expected to have feminine nature, good at cooking, cleaning, crying, or having too many emotions. I never fell into those categories. At a young age, I started living in a city with my brother; he was the only guardian I had. I do not know if it was the influence of my brother, but I was “tomboy” during my schooling years. I loved basketball, so skirts were not my things, I had more male friends than female, and I was not good at expressing my emotions. Even after I came to the United States of America, there was a phase in my life where I had short hair. One of the most asked questions to me at that time was whether I was into girls. I was not offended by them for asking if I like girls but annoyed by the prejudice because of my appearance. Now when I think of it nothing has changed in me except that now I wear more skirts and play less basketball, have long hair, and without any doubt, I am a woman now.
I am a woman now just by the fact that I am wearing a more feminine dress. In my childhood, there were times when I was mad at people for calling me tomboy, as it was usually associated with me having feelings for girls. Even now, I must clarify to my friends when I am telling them my childhood story that I never suppressed my feeling towards the same gender due to fear. It was never the case, I just liked the fact that men had so much power and control. I had always seen my dad solving problems for my mom or my dad taking the lead. I wanted to be someone who can take the lead for my family, especially for my mother. And for me, as a child, it was only possible if you were a man. The fact that our society is built so deeply with the concept of binary gender, that me someone who likes taking the lead and wearing pants was always thought of as being a semi-boy and attracted to the same gender.
We people concentrate so much on the fact that there is only two sex that we start creating other categorizes for people who don’t fall under the construct, the constructs of masculine and feminine. The gender you have been classified as during your birth also, by default, has a specific role in society. Like my father brings food, and my mom cooks. My sisters get married right after they finish their studies, but my brother looks for jobs and opportunities for self- development. Socially taught gender lines to have much influence and power over who we think we are and our gender.
A gender role, gender identity never stopped me from self-identifying myself. I was someone who decided for myself instead of falling under the social construct of gender. As a girl, I was expected to stay at home until I finished my studies and then get married. But instead, I challenged myself and applied for the United States without telling my family. It was one of my many steps to challenge the gender construct within my family. I got into a good college and started my studies. Slowly without knowing, I became the so-called “male” of my family. I began to take responsibility for my family, and I did that, sometimes wearing pants to my work and sometimes wearing a skirt, sometimes writing with my pink pen, and sometimes carrying my blue coffee cup. Gender is a social construct that will take a very long time to change, but what we all can do is identify yourself and march towards a genderless society challenging the binary gender concept.