| Appearance | Feelings | Feelings/ beliefs | Theories | |
| Nose | Love/hate my nose | I have been told that I have a chubby, wide nose | Biological theory
Social leaning theory |
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| Arms | They are to chubby and have small spots on them | Personally, I hate how my arms look when I am wearing a tank top and I tend to compare how I look to how others look and my confidence goes down. |
Social leaning theory |
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| Smile | I don’t have perfect straight teeth therefore I wear braces which does not make me feel comfortable smiling | I personally hate my smile because ever since I had braces people would say mean stuff such as having train tracks on my teeth which I no longer get bothered by, but I still don’t feel confident smiling. | Social learning theory
Psychoanalytical Theory |
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I believe that my embodied communication comply with command performance because to some extend I care about peoples opinions and I try to please them in a way without doing what I truly feel like. I have realized that I have to make changes to make myself happy rather than doing it for others, another thing is that due to social norms I don’t act upon certain things and even with social norms I want to look a certain way because that’s how most girls look like and I need to be / look like them, which is wrong because I need to be me not someone else.
Hey Ligia, I used to care about peoples opinions and I try to please them in a way without doing what I truly feel like too, now it is all about me, myself and I. whatever you do, you will never please people enough, even if you give them the moon. I try to live for myself now, I try to be a little narcissist .
Hi Liguia, i can relate . Trying to please people is an uncomfortable thing , you exchange your happiness for others. Especially when it comes to the work place or any other groups you may affiliate with. It can be easy to feel pressured in social settings , people may make you feel like you have to fit a specific description or behave a certain way to be approved. Glad you’ve realized your happiness matter more !
Hi Ligia, thank you for sharing this. It’s crazy to see how our individual experiences shape and associate certain aspects with a positive or negative. I used to hate my arms because they are super thin and hairy, I associated having thicker arms with strength and power. Something that caught my attention was when you said that you no longer get bothered by certain comments but you are still not confident, I feel I am in the same boat as you but I can’t wait to develop my identity further in order to love myself to the fullest.
Hi Ligia,
I will dare to say that I love the fact that you shared a little bit of yourself with us. I can say that you gave me a different way of seeing and appreciating minimal things like a smile. People always tell me that I have a beautiful smile, but if I am honest I almost don’t like to be smiling, most of the time I am always serious but from now on I think I have to show it more, want more the simple and beautiful things that we have and that must be appreciated because the greatest irony is when a person has something beautiful that others appreciate and they do not notice such thing.
Hi Ligia, This is so relatable. Even until now, I still seek validation in certain situations. I realized that I did not trust myself to make the “right” decision for myself because I was too concerned with other people’s reactions. (Mostly my family) So thank you for sharing this. You got this