Watching the videos and then reading the Gender Stories article made me do a lot of thinking. For instance I related to the young woman with weight issues. I have struggled always struggled with my weight and continue to do so to this day. I sometimes pretend to have all the confidence in the world, but deep down I am a bit insecure about myself. Although I do feel this way I try to not let it prevent me from having a life, but I do make decisions that take into consideration my weight. That could mean buying a certain clothing with the aim of “hiding” imperfections or taking pictures at certain angles, etc. It may also mean taking a bit longer to get the courage to do something, such as enroll in school. Not only am I a “big” girl but I am also older than most of my classmates. But like in the portion under Agency in the Gender Stories article states “Life doesn’t just happen to you–it is something you can have a role in constructing.” Which basically means you have to build your life the way you want it, no one else can do it for you.
If you sit around and do nothing, then nothing will happen. So for the next phase of my life, re-enrolling in school was a necessary part. It was another chapter in my “story.” And as I continued to read the article I realized that whether we realize it or not we actually implement some of these techniques in our everyday lives. We may not all it as such, but it’s there. Such as “reframing.” The article defines it as “shifting perspectives so that you view a situation from a different vantage point.” Sometimes we have to take a step back to see something from someone else’s view, or even a completely different perspective altogether in order to fully understand what is being presented. You may or may not change someone’s mind, but at the least you give them something to think about. And like the article also says, change isn’t always easy, but once someone knows they have choices, it may make all the difference in any given situation.
Once everyone gets on the same page this world will be a much better place to live in. I may be a bit naïve in believing that one day the world will focus on more important stuff about each other, such as accomplishments, maybe their job, what they can bring to the table, etc., rather than what their genitalia entails. But hey, it could happen.
Thanks for being vulnerable with us, Michelle, and talking through your own process of finding agency.