Sophia Ramirez, Conversation 1

1. How does the author feel about her writing abilities?

In Proficiency, the author’s initial confidence in her writing abilities is evident in the first few opening paragraphs of the narrative. She expresses a deep love for writing stating that, “I loved writing just as much as I loved math. It was one of my strengths. I was good at it, and I enjoyed it.” However, on her second failed attempt at the writing portion, her confidence wanes. Faced with failure, she gradually loses her passion for writing, no longer wanting to put forth effort. Consequently, she develops a hatred for writing and begins to doubt her abilities and the ideas she writes about. 

2. How does the author feel about standardized tests?

The author feels anxious about the standardized test after months of preparation, she feels the “pressure was on” even before taking the test. Her test result brought tears to her eyes, showing her emotional reaction to her outcome. She tells herself that the people grading the tests, “Don’t have the slightest clue about what constitutes good writing,” doubting their abilities to accurately assess her writing. Nevertheless, her negative emotions are a big part of her resenting feelings toward standardized testing in general. This becomes a reason for desire to understand why she’d fail the test with no given explanation. Understanding her failure could have maintained her enthusiasm for writing and never led her to give up, leaving an impact which could have changed the author’s academic route and attitude towards writing.

3. If you were Mrs. Brown, the author’s English teacher, what would you say when the author asked: “How can I get A’s in all my English classes but fail the writing part of the proficiency test twice?”

If I were Ms. Brown, some advice i’d give to the author is, 

Sometimes, we tend to overestimate our abilities, and it’s normal to feel that the grade we expect is better than the one we earned. However, it’s important to see these situations as learning experiences. Not every grade will be perfect, and there’s always room for improvement. Doubting yourself after a setback is common, but it’s important to remember that even the best writers face challenges and setbacks along the way. Instead of letting a bad grade overshadow your achievements and efforts, use it as a lesson to overcome obstacles and grow. Your successes, like having your poem on TV and your dedication in class, are clear indicators of your talent and hard work. Don’t let one setback cloud your judgment or diminish your confidence. Keep learning from your experiences, and don’t forget that setbacks are just temporary hurdles on the path to success.

4. Has there been a time in your life when you doubted your abilities as a writer or in general? Explain.

I often have doubts in my writing abilities, even when it comes to writing an email or text. I have a bad habit of writing assignments at the last minute which (obviously) affects the quality of the writing and doesn’t let me show my true efforts. All my life writing has never been my strong suit or something I’ve recognised as a hobby or enjoyment in any part. However, writing is a very crucial skill that I want to develop better and I’ve come to enjoy it more. Despite my desire to improve, setbacks like self-doubt overcome me. I often compare my writing to others’ feeling that my writing falls flat and mediocre. This comparison sometimes leaves me feeling helpless and hinders me from putting in the effort that I know I should. Similar to the author’s experience when she states, “I decided to quit trying so hard,” I find myself losing passion and motivation in those moments and quit trying too hard when the doubt kicks in.