Conversation 1 Zaria Gibbs

Summary

Conversation 1
In 'Proficiency' by Shannon Nichols, we follow her through the journey of her relationship with writing. She begins by describing her view of writing before the proficiency test. She was Nichols was very much of the impression that she was an excellent writer, but when the results of the first test came back she was blindsided. Not only was she shocked that her natural ability didnt reflect in her test results, she was confused by the fact that her classmates who didnt in her eyes didnt possess the amount of skill she had. Shannon decided that even though she was disappointed, she would study and pass with a better grade but would later come to fail the test again with 4.5 5 points she needed. It hurt her even more causing her to cry and start viewing herself as a failure in something she loved which made her care less about writing. Though on her 3rd try on the test she passed, ultimately it destroyed her love and appreciation that she once had for writing. I sympathize with her because I understand how the opinions of others can make you form a resentment towards your craft and towards yourself for not being 'good' at something that you enjoyed or in your eyes you were good at. In 'From Math and Science to Writing' by Professor Barnes, she was hired for an English teaching position which she was excited for, but to her surprise she was rostered to be teaching Math and Science classes. Not only was she nervous because she didnt have any experience in that area, this caused 'trauma' to surface from her childhood causing her to feel even more intimidated and incompetent to teach the class. In these first moments especially she finds herself feeling extremely vulnerable and that everyone can see right through her. Her story does have a happier ending though, after a year and a half she had enough.And although she didnt learn Math or Science, she learned about the public school system in the inner city. She took her experience and wrote articles , even publishing a novel loosely based on this experience. It's quite inspiring seeing how Prof. Barnes was able to turn an unfortunate situation into an opportunity to let her voice be heard. My own relationship with writing and reading is interesting. I always loved reading and regarded myself to be a good writer and I still believe that to an extent although I feel a little rusty. I had a story though where on my S.E.A. or Secondary Entrance Assessment, a test the schools in the English speaking Caribbean usually use to determine which secondary school a child goes to, I passed out. I had spent the past two years preparing for the exam, learning correct spelling, pronunciation and even descriptive phrases that would help me in my stories which was important because creative writing made up 1/3 of the final mark. On the big day I was writing my creative writing story, when the proctor announced that there was only 5 minutes left. 11 year old Zaria was stunned. Where did all the time go? I began to hyperventilate, my vision went in and out, my teacher asked me to stand to go the nurse and as soon as I stood I lost consciousness. My nervousness to ace the test had gotten the better of me. While it wasn't funny in the moment, I can look back at it and laugh. I now dont put as much pressure on myself to be perfect in writing but my goal is to be as expressive as possible.