Alok’s statement that “I still can’t step outdoors without being frightened for my safety” shattered my heart. The tone of their writing made me aware of their grief, rejection, and frustration. Being attacked for being who and how you want to be seen is unfair. To be terrified of going to the store because I could get harassed for my mode of expression is, in my opinion, mentally damaging. I became aware of how ignorant I had been about gender. Gender is like art in that it inspires and aspires with boundless creativity. Moving past these causes Alok frustration, anguish, and concern for their safety as a non-conforming person.

To Alok Because “sex” is not just biological, but also cultural and politically motivated, the statement “I agree that gender is cultural and sex is biological” seems like a deception. And this raises the question of whether one can rely on science to determine a person’s gender at birth. In his discussion of an intersex person who might be born with genitalia that appears to be between the typical male and female genders, Alok demonstrates how binary sex is politically constructed by pointing out that doctors continue to perform non-consensual and unwarranted surgeries just because the person is different. Furthermore, research indicates that chromosomes do not always correlate with sex and cannot be used to determine a person’s sexual orientation, be it homosexual, bisexual, or straight. Therefore, this is about intentional prejudice rather than science deciding who is who.

Another issue that makes me uncomfortable is gender policing when I am required to modify my behavior in order to please others and fit their perception of what is “normal” for me. Many people think there is a specific perspective I should take on a certain incident or circumstance. People should learn to brace themselves and be at ease with their gender expression as language and cultures change. For instance, when I visit my parent’s in-laws, I still need to appear a specific way. Nobody should have the right to decide what is and is not acceptable/appropriate.

Alok’s perspective of the gender binary expresses how we were set up for failure from the start. When thinking of what that can mean I reflected on my childhood and how I was raised. I was raised with the thought that there were only two genders male and female. The older I got I met transgender people, and eventually I learned about different pronouns such as they/them. I have always been more accepting of people because I knew how it feels like to not be accepted. We are now in a time of life where they are even making gender-neutral bathrooms to take away gender. The topic of gender is a topic that you need to be educated on to speak about respectfully, one may say they are accepting but they. are just tolerating different gender norms. Beyond the Gender Binary helps with the answers to struggling questions when it comes to gender.

Alok finds it challenging to transcend the gender binary because of the obvious violence, discrimination, and persecution he experiences as a non-conforming gender. When it comes to transgender people have it harder than most because they are questioned more and get the most looks when on the streets. Marsha P Johnson who was a Trans woman who fought for the lives and equality of trans people, was murdered because of the skin she choose to live in. . Alok stated in the book “I still can’t walk outside without being terrified for my safety”, still to this day after all Marsha P Johnson did there are still many trans who have died because of who they are. In 2022 about 40 trans people died from vicious attacks on them in the streets. It’s not fair that someone has to be guarded or feel as if they have to tone down who they are when going onto the streets.

Alok mentions that we shouldn’t use “it’s common sense” as a statement that is used very often, but common sense isn’t actually common. What might come to someone naturally or in a different light might be the same for someone else. Others need to be educated on the matter before having to feel anything about the subject. Alok was bullied for who he was in high school and since then has gotten apologies from his abusers. One of my co-workers is a cisgender male but he enjoys painting his nails and he gets ridiculed for that daily because that is not ” a way a man ” should express himself. Gender conformity will always be p for debate because of the lack of education from birth. Culturally there may not always be acceptance for nongender norms as well due to religion or upbringing.

The reading starts off strong. Alok Manon wants us to recognize that a lot of people have opinions in places they don’t have all the right information for and I completely agree. I have heard countless conversations about people and how they identify/ express their gender and sexuality. I have grown up to be the person who tries to shut it down as soon as I hear some wrong things. By wrong things I mean ignorance, oppressive language, or just straight up lies told as facts. I believe it is one of those topics that you really need to be educated on enough to speak about respectfully, especially if it doesn’t really concern you or your health. Which is why I found the reading “Beyond the Gender Binary” very enlightening. We learned that these kinds of conversations about non-binary, transgender,and gender non-conforming are, a lot of the time, had to target them. People share opinions, even debate people’s basic human rights.

 There are a few different laws people tried to set in the U.S. that go against transgender people. One quote that stood out to me was ”Bias and discrimination are not just being endorsed, they are given the green light.” I just thought that it was true. When people with power start discussing taking away the rights of certain groups of humans it allows people to think differently about these people. It encourages a hierarchy. It encourages discrimination. “I do not have the luxury of being.” This quote hit me. I feel like as a teenage girl I take a lot of things for granted. For example my health or my time and opportunities. After reading that quote it put into perspective how little I was aware of the effort people have to put to be themselves, when I can do that easily without judgment just because I express my gender in the most common way of our society. I am happy to recognize that ignorance of mine and improve it. 

The author then mentions how power has a huge impact on how people view transgender, non-binary, gender non-conforming people. It makes a lot of sense to me. I have seen how power, and the lack thereof, creates a certain environment and creates almost like shields from consequences. It makes sense that when people go against these environments and make people face some consequences for their actions, the people in power are going to want to fight back in some way. So they bully, they degrade, they discriminate, but none of it takes away from the main issue being the power imbalance in people. In order to understand and become better people we need to see the power we hold in ourselves and use it for good. 

The author tells us a story of how when they were in highschool they had a bully, this bully then reached out years after graduation to apologize and explain that it was their own internalized homophobia that made them act the way they did. This doesn’t excuse it. I am actually really concerned about the amount of times I have heard stories similar to this. It is almost always a side plot in shows that have teenagers as main characters. I truly do think it’s getting old, maybe I can never understand because my family were never that religious or just never that against the LGBTQIA+ community but I still think it doesn’t excuse how you treat a person. I understand that way of thinking is taught, but at what age should people start being held accountable for the way they think and the harmful things they do to people? 

Some more things I learned were not to use very specific statements like “it’s common sense…” and saying that only women have children. The first phrase is just overall pretty rude but now I’ve also learned that it can spread misinformation and create some “norms” that shouldn’t be. And the phrase about childbirth, I have already started to change that, I need to solidify it and teach others around me too. Women aren’t the only people able to carry and birth a child. Men, transgender and non-binary people can also carry/birth kids. What I found interesting from earlier in the text is how people ask for the child’s gender in order to really see them as a person, as a little human being. I can see that, I wonder if I even do that. There haven’t been many kids born recently in my family so I don’t know what my reaction would be if someone told me they were having a baby and I think that’s a little bothersome to me. Would I ask their gender? And once they told me would that change anything that I say afterwards? I can go further into the reading but this is already 800 words so i’ll just say I found it all very informative with all the statistics and examples, I feel as if I was taught a lot.