Author Archives: Donya-Shae Gordon

Donya-Shae Gordon- Reading Reflection 3

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Privilege and Oppression are fueled through systems and the participation of society. Privilege is unearned access or advantages granted to specific groups of people because of their membership in a social group. Privilege can be based on various social identities such as race, gender, religion, socioeconomic status, ability status, sexuality, age, education level, and more. Oppression is the unfair or cruel use of power to control another person or group. The term is often used in a context to refer to the oppression of minority groups such as women and racial minorities. In America we deal with many forms of oppression in our daily lives, different groups of people are more oppressed than others. There are social justice groups who try to maintain to be the voice for the voiceless during times when privilege and oppression are shown.

Being a female I deal with the oppression of women which has been a constant throughout American history. White women in the upper middle and working class saw a correlation between the oppression of slaves and the oppression they faced as women, both treated as inferiors in society. Men have always been known as being the dominant race, especially white males in America. Women had to fight for the right to vote and work. There was a period in time when women weren’t allowed to own property and had to hand over their money to their husbands. Women were always just known as a wife, caregivers, and only good enough to tend a house. At times it still feels as if men think of women as just that, the article Oppression by Marilyn Frye says “harassed by men who try things or flatten them or reduce them in bulk, to persuade her into it and pressure her to”relax” and “let her hair down”; men just think women need to be sexual at all times. While walking down the street women have to deal with being catcalled.

In the reading White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy Mcintosh she says ” I think whites are carefully taught not to recognize white privilege, as males are taught not to recognize male privilege”. These stood out to me because without acknowledgment and taking accountability there can’t be a change. The case of the innocent killing of Trayvon Martin and the murder of George Zimmerman reminds me a lot of White privilege here in America. Zimmerman killed Trayvon Martin because he had a hoodie on while he was walking back home from getting snacks from the store. Zimmerman appointed himself as the “neighborhood watch” and said he felt as if Trayvon Martin was up to no good because of how he looked. Unfortunately, he was found not guilty of the brutal killing, instead juror of “his kind” found him innocent due to the verdict of self-defense. In America that shouldn’t be a shock anymore that White men will walk from a brutal crime while African American men do jail time. Cyntoia Brown was found guilty and spent 15 years behind bars after receiving a life sentence at 16 years old. Cyntoia Brown killed 43-year-old real estate agent Johnny Allen, who paid to have sex with her, Brown says the murder happen in self-defense when trying to escape him. The juror didn’t find her innocent or as a victim in her case as they did Zimmerman, white man privilege was at the forefront, and for Cyntoia Brown being African American woman the odds were against her.

I viewed oppression and privilege differently before reading these two articles. I didn’t know privilege came in different groups I believe it was just race driven. I took the time to also read When privilege and oppression intersect. When I first began reading it I thought it was from the point of view of a black male on campus, I was stunned when it turned out to be a white male who is blind. The article made me feel as though privilege and oppression can intersect at times. In order to start to begin with a change where everyone feels equal first it has to be accepted. There are many social justice groups that are fighting for their rights and some even interact with one another beliefs. There’s a group known as Fighting Hate a non-profit organization monitoring the activities of domestic hate groups and other extremists. Privilege and Oppression steams from the hate people give

Donya-Shae Gordon-Discussion 4

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Privilege describes benefits that belong to people because they fit into a specific social group. From watching the video I can say I was privileged because I grew up in a two-parent household where both of my parents worked hard to provide for my siblings and me. Growing up I had friends who parent/parents were addicted to drugs and their living conditions were like mine, I remember being told ” you’re so lucky to have parents like this”. When I was younger I didn’t appreciate the parents I had I thought they were controlling and overbearing but the older I got once I built a better relationship with them I learned to appreciate them more. My sibling and I never need for anything growing up, always had a roof over our heads and food in the fridge. Not everyone can say their childhood was the same way so that’s one way I feel as if I was privileged in life. I didn’t think I was privileged before watching this video because being Dominican and Jamaican, a female, and a bisexual female at that I dealt with a lot of oppression for how I looked. I’ve been working in the technology community since I was 18 years old and I get judged on the way I looked daily. For example, I was told by a customer before that they rather work with a male because I wasn’t “techy enough this is a male industry” and I just had to walk away. There was a time when I was working at T-Mobile in a middle east neighborhood when a middle eastern man walked in refused to work with me and ignored me because I was a female and wasn’t middle Eastern, it took my middle eastern manager to speak to him in the language to let him know it okay to work with me. The entire time I worked with him after I said anything he would look up at my boss before responding to me. I’ve been judged on the color of my skin, my tattoos, my sexuality, and my gender so I never felt as if I was privileged. After watching the video my definition of privilege is that it is unearned access or benefits granted to specific groups of people because they are part of a social group. Privilege can be based on a variety of social identities such as race, gender, religion, socioeconomic status, ability status, sexuality, age, education level, and more. Oppression is the unfair or cruel use of power to control another person or group. Oppression is often used about the oppression of minority groups such as women and racial minorities.

Donya-Shae Gordon- Reading Reflection 2

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Alok’s perspective of the gender binary expresses how we were set up for failure from the start. When thinking of what that can mean I reflected on my childhood and how I was raised. I was raised with the thought that there were only two genders male and female. The older I got I met transgender people, and eventually I learned about different pronouns such as they/them. I have always been more accepting of people because I knew how it feels like to not be accepted. We are now in a time of life where they are even making gender-neutral bathrooms to take away gender. The topic of gender is a topic that you need to be educated on to speak about respectfully, one may say they are accepting but they. are just tolerating different gender norms. Beyond the Gender Binary helps with the answers to struggling questions when it comes to gender.

Alok finds it challenging to transcend the gender binary because of the obvious violence, discrimination, and persecution he experiences as a non-conforming gender. When it comes to transgender people have it harder than most because they are questioned more and get the most looks when on the streets. Marsha P Johnson who was a Trans woman who fought for the lives and equality of trans people, was murdered because of the skin she choose to live in. . Alok stated in the book “I still can’t walk outside without being terrified for my safety”, still to this day after all Marsha P Johnson did there are still many trans who have died because of who they are. In 2022 about 40 trans people died from vicious attacks on them in the streets. It’s not fair that someone has to be guarded or feel as if they have to tone down who they are when going onto the streets.

Alok mentions that we shouldn’t use “it’s common sense” as a statement that is used very often, but common sense isn’t actually common. What might come to someone naturally or in a different light might be the same for someone else. Others need to be educated on the matter before having to feel anything about the subject. Alok was bullied for who he was in high school and since then has gotten apologies from his abusers. One of my co-workers is a cisgender male but he enjoys painting his nails and he gets ridiculed for that daily because that is not ” a way a man ” should express himself. Gender conformity will always be p for debate because of the lack of education from birth. Culturally there may not always be acceptance for nongender norms as well due to religion or upbringing.

Donya-Shae Gordon- Discussion 3

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To move beyond the gender binary for Alok is to look beneath the surface of what the eye can see. While reading Beyond the Gender Binary by Alok he describes what is the ” norm” for people who are gender fluid. Looking through the lens of Alok I was able to understand there isn’t just man and woman but instead wherever you feel comfortable. For me that’s how I live my life as well I’m very open-minded and accepting of those around me. I believe my acceptance came from being rejected for my sexuality I never would want someone else to feel that way. I recently met someone who is gender fluid and uses they/them pronouns. It was hard for me at first to not misgender them but to use their born-gender pronouns. It was as if my mind was seeing one thing but my mind knew the proper way of identifying who was standing in front of me. We all have to teach ourselves to accept someone for their are is a genius action and not just a tolerable action. Many will say I accept but behind closed doors, their face will be misgendered or confused, and not try to find understanding. Gender is the shell we live in but we don’t have to confirm this shell. Our shells that we are born in can be designed in any way we want that makes us happy.


I identify as a cisgender female, but I may not be everyone’s typical cisgender female. I’m into fashion so my fashion isn’t just what people will call ” girly style”. I will label myself a sneakerhead with a twist, what that means is the majority of the time I will have on the latest sneakers and will only wear heels for a dinner. My best friend always makes a joke that I have testosterone in my body because I don’t like the typical girly styles much. It hasn’t offended me when he has said that to me because I know he accepts e for me. You will rarely see me in many prints I prefer black, natural tones, and subtle tones in my clothes of choice. I can’t even say I own a polka dot, stripes, or floral print shirt like “cisgender females” have. I prefer to look fashionable and usually go against my gender identity that way. I do fit my gender binary norm because I’m very into my looks as well. My nails, eyelashes, and eyebrows are always done, I love to look nice and give myself that “feminine” look at all times. I have enhanced my feminine side as well my getting certain plastic surgeries done to feel comfortable in my skin.

Reading Reflection #1: Donya-Shae Gordon

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“Sex & Gender 101” by Kyl Myers was very captivating and insightful for me. Biological sex is something we all are taught from birth. Kyl Myers breaks everything down about sex chromosomes, intersex, and hormones. I’ve recently watched a podcast on youtube about someone who was born intersex, prior to that I didn’t know what an intersex was. In the video, Roshaante Andersen was born intersex growing up his family dressed him as a female, and once he got older is when he realized he identifies as a male. For me growing up in a traditional older Dominican and Jamaican household there wasn’t a gender talk, it’s either you are a male or female from birth. Once I was 16 years old I met a young man at the time who was gay, he was in the process of transitioning to female. Aubrey and I were always good friends and I choose to support my friend, she taught us a lot about the process she had to go through to feel content in her skin finally. Aubrey always explained that prior to transitioning she felt like she was trapped in a stranger’s body. That was the first time had the chance to experience gender identity.

Gender pronouns are something I’ve been working on in my personal life, I’m used to the pronouns He/Him/His and She/Her/Hers. They/ Them are gender pronouns I have always heard of but I never met anyone you used them. The first time I met someone who uses The/Them pronouns was last winter while I was a Training Lead at Apple. I wanted to be inclusive and respect their pronouns but I did struggle at first with the use of They/Them pronouns, it’s like my brain was seeing something in front of me so naturally, I was referring to them by how they looked. I never wanted to offend them so anytime I did mess up their pro nouns I would apologize immediately. Gender expression is literally the biggest label maker for us. People will automatically make assumptions about your gender and sexuality based on how you are dressed. There are days when I’m “girly” and other days when I like to be more comfortable and will put on a sweatsuit and sneakers. I remember one time I had on a sweatsuit and sneakers a boy was trying to get my attention while I was in the store waiting for my sandwich, I was ignoring him because I wasn’t interested. The boy kept trying to get my attention then his friend says ” Bro that’s a dyke that’s why she ain’t paying you mind, she doesn’t want what you got”, I was so shocked to be labeled a “dyke” because I wasn’t interested and the way I was dressed.

Prior to reading “Feminism Is For Everybody – Passionate Politics” by Bell Hooks, I thought feminism was women who support women only. I did think it was anti-male and all about women’s empowerment. Bell Hooks let me know what feminism really means, to be a feminist you want equality for ALL! When I learned that there is a such thing as a sexist woman, it did remind me of one of my aunts. I thought she was the way she was because of our culture, she often made comments that a woman is supposed to be taken care of, a man is supposed to work and bring home the money while we women are only supposed to be kept women. I knew I wanted more for myself than just be the “trophy wife” as she would call it.

Donya-Shae Gordon- Discussion 2

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 “a movement to end sexism, sexist exploitation, and oppression.” Explain what you understand this definition to mean.

This definition was said by Hooks more than 10 years ago in her book Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center. As the movement progressed, it became clear that the problem is sexism and sexist thinking in both men and women. Hooks spoke about oppression when she stated “Whether it was white women working on behalf of socialism, black women working on behalf of civil rights and black liberation, or Native American women working for indigenous rights, it was clear that men wanted to lead, and they wanted women to follow.” Men didn’t think a woman could lead and were better for the background. From my understanding Feminism is the act of equality for all without thinking of age, gender, race, or any other label that may be put on you, this is what became the movement. Hook’s definition made it clear that it’s genderless because there are women who support sexist exploitation without being aware due to their cultural backgrounds. The freedom to be who you are and be accepted by all is what I also felt while reading this.

How does this definition compare with what you thought “feminism” meant before you did this reading?

Before I did this reading I thought Feminism was strictly about women’s empowerment and it was anti-male. I believe feminists were a group of women who felt as though they were just as equal to men or even more superior to men. While reading it stated “As contemporary feminism progressed, women realized that males were not the only group in our society who supported sexist thinking and behavior” and I had to think back to childhood. While growing up my older family members who are women believed that a man must work and bring home the money while a woman stays and cares for the home. I can now say I understand that those same older family members were part of the problem instead of being a part of the movement.

How does the reading Sex and Gender 101 compare with what you thought about gender before you did this reading?

Sex and Gender 101 was very interesting to me, I work for Apple and we accept everyone for who they are. I have done my own research to educate myself on pro-nouns since I do have some co-workers who use the pronouns they/them. I think the way everything was broken down into categories in the reading will help me teach new hires about one identity. When someone sees a female they may not understand that the “female” identify as a male, the way a “female” has a tomboy style instead of being quick to label them ” lesbian” one has to understand their gender expression. I identify as a cisgender female but there are days when my expression may throw someone off to my gender because I choose to wear a sweat suit and sneakers and look less “girly”. “The nature of one’s sexuality is changeable and subject to change throughout time and that sexual behavior/sexual identity doesn’t always match” when I read this it reminded me of one of my cousins she is a cisgender female but comes of masculine due to her gender expression, recently she has been more open to her feminine side and has switch it up and it shocks the family since we were used to her one way.

Discussion Post #1 Introduction

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My name is Donya-Shae but everyone calls me Shae, my pronouns are she/her/hers. My name Donya is of Arabic and Persian origin in Arabic it means the world and in Spanish and Italian it means lady. The Shae part of my name is of Irish origin and it means full of majesty. When picking my name my older sister knew the meaning of the two names and told my parents, my dad’s name is David so he loved the fact I will have a D in my name as well.  My Major is Communication Studies. After this semester I just need one science class to graduate and I plan on getting my bachelor’s in Public relations and minor in Human Resources. I grew up on the Eastside of Harlem but I now live in queens I got my own apartment about 4 years ago now. The part of queens I live in is called Jamaica I’m about 30 minutes from 34th street. My family is big I have 4 siblings from my mom and 3 siblings from my dad. In total, I have 5 sisters and 2 brothers I’m the middle child on both sides. My nationality is Dominican and Jamaican, I have been to both islands they are beautiful. I live with my partner in queens we have been together for 5 years we have a fur baby together which is a toy-size Yorkie poo who is 3 years old his name is Bando. My birthday is February 23 I will be turning 28 years old, I am a Pisces which is a water sign. I’m taking this class because I have always gone through situations where I was discriminated against for being a woman. When looking up this class it seem very interesting to me and made me feel like I would view things through a bigger lens after. My favorite food will have to be pizza for something quick while outside but I do enjoy cooking nothing will ever beat a home-cooked meal! My favorite meal to make is stuffed salmon and mashed potatoes. The most unusual food I’ve eaten is Duck from a Thai restaurant, surprisingly it was so good. My favorite restaurant in NY is Brooklyn Chop House located in lower Manhattan. I advise everyone to go there at least once it is an Asian fusion steakhouse. My top three go-to when going there is the lobster fried rice, the chicken satay, and the lamb chops my favorite drink is their frozen lychee and my non-alcoholic drink will be their Shirley Temple ( sprite and cherry grenadine). My favorite color is green all hues of green not just a specific one. When it comes to my favorite place to visit it will have to be anywhere that has a beautiful beach, the water and waves are very calming to me and brings a type of peace to me that’s hard to find at times. A podcast I’ve listened to that is tied to race will be Code Switch. Code Switch speaks about race around the world by showing empathy with humor they make it relatable.