Betty Friedan’s The Feminine Mystique was well written; it is properly crafted for the audience to understand why women are forced to be flawless because women are perceived as puppets. The Feminine Mystique expressed the concerns of millions of American women with their constrained gender roles and helped fuel broad public agitation for gender equality.

Friedan considers “the feminine mystique” to be a step backwards for women. She considers first-wave feminists to have hung up their coats after gaining the right to vote. Men still consider women as possessions and as things that can’t/shouldn’t fend for themselves. When, in actuality, women are in charge, they bring life into the world, and they are cognitively and emotionally stronger than males. Betty Friedan defined these women’s dissatisfaction as “the issue with no name.” Women felt this way because they were obliged to be intellectually, financially, and physically submissive to males. Women have been grappling with their roles as housewives and mothers, which at first appeared to be a dream for many women but has turned out to be a nightmare.

The problem that has no name”. The matter that is still keeping women in the dark and having to be treated like second options. The issue that is having a lot of females questioning their worth and thinking to themselves, “is this all I amount to”. The Feminine Mystique is a reading which explores the lives of countless females after the world war. Women were expected to be the “typical American housewife”, they were expected to take pride in not “existing”. For years, it was a duty of the women, to be a good wife and a mother to her kids. To cook, clean, do the laundry and never indulge herself in higher education. Politics, employment etc. were of the responsibilities of men. What is the problem? The vague barrier that captured women from interceding those undefined urges to be something more than just a “housewife’. For generations mothers, grandmothers, aunties have had to painfully give up dreams, hopes and aspirations. For over a decade, if a woman was to have a dream, it was to keep her husband happy so he does not leave her (how is keeping someone else happy your dream or duty), to have kids and let them be well fed. “Experts told them how to catch a man and keep him,  how to breastfeed children and handle their toilet training, how to cope with sibling rivalry and adolescent rebellion; how to buy a dishwasher, bake bread, cook gourmet snails, and build a swimming pool with their own hands; how to dress, look, and act more feminine and make marriage more exciting;  how to keep their husbands from dying young and their sons from growing into delinquents”. Who are these experts? How are they so sure that this what a woman should do? And most importantly, are the women happy or content doing these activities? Society has induced the thoughts into us those men have always and should always have the upper hand in major discussion circulating us, and even the ones that directly affects our lives. According to the reading, long ago women used to envy men and tried to be like them, instead of trying to find destiny in their “femineity” and having glory in that. Women have fought for equal rights and now that liberation is almost here, there seems to be another barrier. Facing prejudice and discrimination in the workplace, school and so on. The issues relating to the feminine mystique is far from over, but there is hope.

 I learnt in my middle school days, there were parts of the world where an activity called, “Female Genital Mutilation” was practiced. It was a kind of norm during those to cut the clitoris of an adolescent who had hit puberty. This was a very important practice which took place to prevent the females from having sexual desires, and furtherly driving them to have sexual intercourse before marriage. Thus, the main purpose of the practice during those times was to both prevent teenage pregnancy and premarital intercourse. Of course it was not mandated, however mothers and heads of families forced their female daughters into doing this mostly to prevent shame befalling their families.

The Feminine Mystic is something I think all the women of the 50s needed to read. Women from a young age are taught that a true woman is nurturing and lives solely for her husband and kids. The Feminine Mystic speaks of the “problem with no name” that all housewives had in common, but they could not place their fingers on it. The problem was they were living for everyone else around them but themselves. The Feminine Mystic speaks about the way women were brainwashed by society to think true femininity was being nurturing and beautiful; nothing more. Women only focused on keeping their husbands and children happy and keeping their home looking like it belongs in a magazine. The Feminine Mystic reads, “Experts told them how to catch a man and keep him,  how to breastfeed children and handle their toilet training, how to cope with sibling rivalry and adolescent rebellion; how to buy a dishwasher, bake bread, cook gourmet snails, and build a swimming pool with their own hands; how to dress, look, and act more feminine and make marriage more exciting;  how to keep their husbands from dying young and their sons from growing into delinquents.” This is what the women of that period were taught, magazines told them how to keep their home beautiful and husbands happy not to find their true purpose and do what makes them truly happy. The problem with no name was that calling for something more than cleaning and cooking. I loved how The Feminine Mystic spoke about true femininity and what it really means to be a woman. The Feminine Mystic reads, “it says this femininity is so mysterious and intuitive and close to the creation and origin of life that man-made science may never be able to understand it.  But however special and different, it is in no way inferior to the nature of man; it may even in certain respects be superior.” Women are the most powerful being God created, we bring life into the world, we are so multitalented it’s a superpower. Full career women with families keep the home in check, raise the kids, work full time, and find the time for self-care and hobbies; if that’s not a superhero then I don’t know what is. On the other, it is mind-boggling to see that after all these women are still seen as inferior to men in the modern day. Why are women still expected to cook and clean and look after the kids after a long day of work or hell just being at home?

In The Politics of Housework by Pat Mainardi, Mainardi speaks about the way women are undermined in relationships when it comes to housework and if we are truly liberated. She speaks of men and their need to feel superior in every aspect and how housework makes them feel lesser than because it’s a never-ending cycle and there is no higher goal.  Mainardi said that she spoke to her partner about how they should share the housework as they share everything else, and he said sure, but she knew there was a catch. Mainardi writes, “I don’t mind sharing the housework, but I don’t do it very well. We should each do the things we’re best at.” MEANING: Unfortunately, I’m no good at things like washing dishes or cooking. What I do best is a little light carpentry, changing light bulbs, moving furniture (how often do you move furniture?).” Men will not do anything that they believe questions their manly hood so washing dishes is out of the question because it’s a “women’s job.” The fact that some men still think this way is revolting. Why is cleaning seen as the job of a woman; we work the same hours, same field, yet the women are still expected to cook and clean. Then when you nag them, and they finally get up to do the housework they play dumb and act like they don’t know how to do it in hopes that you will get frustrated and do it for them. Most men from a young age have everything done for them, cooking cleaning, tying their shoes, hell, even brushing their hair. So, as they get older, they expect their partners to do the same. A while back there was a tik tok going around of a wife who had to print out images of the items she wanted her husband to get from the grocery along with the number he needed to pick up. This was manipulation at its finest, he didn’t want to do the hard job of thinking and doing the grocery shopping, so he played dumb and had his wife do the work for him.  I liked Mainardi’s example with the wolves and female spiders. She claims that men see themselves as the alphas they are meant to lead and make a change, not to do housework. But I know that most of the time the alpha of a wolf pack is controlled by the female wolf.  Female spiders eat the heads of their mates, and the queen bee does the same and runs the hive. Male birds must dance and look pretty to win over a female bird, and sperm whales fight to the death to win over a mate. In most species, if not all, the females are the superior ones. So, what’s not clicking with the human species why are women still seen as inferior. Men judge everything else but themselves, I loved Hannah Nichols’s post regarding a woman keeping her stocking perfect in the 50s. It’s so funny to me that a man would care about his wife’s stocking when she is running the home and keeping his life in order. It is funny how they are always so concerned with our appearance even today, yet they don’t know our anatomy. Most men only focus on their needs and want, women on the other hand are naturally peaceful caring beings. Yes, we are working harder than the men in most professional fields, we run the home raise the kids, and fulfill our needs, but I believe we will not be completely liberated until we stop caring about the needs of others; it’s time to be selfish.

The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan was wonderfully written, it is perfectly written for the audience to understand the perspective on why women are pressured to be perfect because women are seen as pawns. A way to fulfill an agenda, gender roles are sectioned off in order to control and received power in manipulation. By manipulating genders against each other, the higher ups have it easier to achieve their secret agendas. Men till this day treat women as objects and as things that cannot/ should not fend for themselves. When in reality women are the one in control, they bring in life, they are mentally and emotionally stronger than men are. Physical strength is used to popularize men because that is what they have one up against women. They are stronger, in seeing they are stronger they are condition to believe they are better and should be in control. In America everything is use to a political advantage, work, education, place’s to live, and that is how they capitalizes. We all are a pawn in their plans and games they pull.

The Politics of Housework by Pat Mainardi

women are expected to clean, maintained men and the children they birth out. While in the 50’s and 60’s women weren’t expected anymore to put men above them but as time goes on. The more women get rights, the more men convert back into the old way of life. Conditioning women and themselves, they see women as caretakers of them and others. Since women are naturally careful and taught to take care of others before him.

This week, we had a collection of articles to read and a YouTube video to watch! Both the articles and the YouTube video were interesting and, like always, I’ve learned so much! All of the assigned readings and the video provided me with, yet another, a unique view and perspective on the topic of “feminism.” In the first article, “ the Feminine Mystique”by author Betty Friedan, Friedman started to look into “the problem that has no name” by researching the lives of white, middle-class women that lives in the suburbs during post World War Two America. Originally, during World War Two, because all men were away fighting the at, there was a major labor shortage. A lot of positions in society opened up and it also needed to be filled. During that time, women stepped up to fill the shoes that were left empty. Up until this point in history, women were expected to be house wives and home makers. They are to rear children, make the house, prepare meals in the kitchen and they were not supposed to leave the house to make money or provide. That was what they referred to as a “perfect” woman. The bread winning task was meant to be given to the father of the family as it is more masculine. However, due to the on going World War Two, women had to become the sole bread winner of the family. Whether it was a factory job, construction, accountant, civil services, and everything in between, women fulfilled these roles and found a plethora of new colors that they quickly added to their life palette. Once the war ended, however, society expected women to return to their homes and resume the “normal” tasks women were supposed to uphold. Friedan writes in the article that women everywhere started to ask themselves, “Is that all?” Is that all women were meant for? A temporary place holder? A permanent house keeper and children raiser? An object that is supposed to server men and their sexual needs? This was ultimately what Betty Friedan described as “The Feminine Mystique.” It was the assumption that women can find happiness and live a fulfilling life from their house work, raising children, and having a sexual life. It was further more assumed that it would be considered “non-feminine” if women desired to work, obtain a degree, or to even have political opinions. Betty Friedman ultimately wanted to prove to everyone that none of this is true and that women everywhere are unsatisfied with their position in society and how they cannot even voice their own opinions or feelings. 

In another reading titled “The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm,” by Anne Koedt, it explains to the readers how the vaginal orgasm for women doesn’t not really exist as it is mostly made up and fetishized by men. In fact, most women orgasm through clitoris stimulation as that is where most of a women’s nerves for sexual pleasure is at. It also goes into detail of horrendous practices in the past to keep women in check. For example, in the past, some men would put their wives through surgery to have their clitoris removed, therefore, she would not be inclined to sleep with other men. This would have undoubtedly harmed a women’s sex drive and definitely took a huge chunk out of their womanhood.

All in all, through the articles and the videos that we’re assigned to us this week, I have found them all to be extremely interesting and I have undoubtedly learned a lot. 

The Politics of Housework by Pat Mainardi really struck me. While women are not expected to housewives in the same way they were in 50’s and 60’s we are still expected to do the house chores just the same on top of everything else. Men are simply not taught from an early age how to do the cleaning and the cooking. Women are still, even if not said out loud, seen as natural caretakers and judged if we don’t want children or want to settle down and marry.

I find, even in my own relationship some of the same things said in that essay, said today. My boyfriend has definitely said to me the points of “but we just have different standards”, etc – when it comes to how the household is kept. I even have that womanly shame if someone comes over and the house is not tidy. I think back to when I was a little girl and my mom wouldn’t allow anybody over unless the apartment was spotless. I couldn’t understand it then, but my mom was fearful of people judging how she keeps her place. It’s feelings like this that a man could never begin to understand and I really hope that our newer generations raise our children learning to clean and cook the same as each other.

The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan is a perfect description of how women’s purpose in life is really treated like it is only in the “fulfillment of their own femininity”. Gender roles in America are very political and they really are a foundation of how capitalism, the work force, education has run in this country. We each have our roles, as either breadmakers or babymakers and besides that it is clear in how society treats us that anything else is less than.

Betty Friedan was a journalist, activist, and co-founder of the National Organization for Women. She was one of the early leaders of the women’s rights movement. She published The Feminine Mystique on February 19,1963. The book inspired the modern feminist movement in the United States. In our excerpts, she described the pervasive dissatisfaction among women in the post World War II. She also talks about the historical causes of female unhappiness. Many housewives were not satisfied with their lives, but they had difficulty expressing their feelings. She said” The problem lay buried, unspoken, for many years in the minds of Americans women “ And” It was a strange stirring, a sense of dissatisfaction, a yearning that women suffered in the middle of the twentieth century in the United States”  At this time all women shared the same problem, but “the problem that has no name”

After World War II, the only dream of women was to be a perfect wife for their husbands, they wanted to take care of their husbands, see their husbands happy, they wanted to take care of their homes.  They had no desire for higher education, careers, or political voice, but they were satisfied with their domestic work. For example,  the snapshot of Sadira Mohammed shows us this example when the woman says “ I don’t need right- I have a Kitchen” .Woman was seen as a “ human being” but among those women there were others women who want to be poets, or physicists. So women started to fight for her liberation., to solve the problem. So she said” It is ridiculous to tell girls to keep quiet when they enter a new friend, or an old one, so the men will not notice they are there.” 

In the video Melissa Harris-Perry said her mother balanced domestic work and her career. Her mother In her own raised two daughters. Today we see many professional women who care about her family and about her work.

In the “The politics of Housework “ Pat Mainardi talks about the issue that most men see housework as a woman’s job. She says housework is not only assigned to women , but for both men and women.In the passage she uses her own husband.  As an example. “I don’t mind sharing the work, but you’ll have to show me how to do it.” It seems like men cannot do anything without women.” Man’s accomplishments have always depended on getting help from other people, mostly women.” I liked these sentences from Pat Mainardi “ participatory democracy begins at home. ” If you are planning to implement your politics, there are certain things to remember ” outside they talk about democracy, the libre expression, but at home they are only the one who decides.

The Myth of the vaginal orgasm  by Anne Koedt said that the clitoris is the center of sexual sensitivity. We can also see the male dominance and female subordination “ Men also seem suspiciously aware of the clitoral powers during”foreplay” When they want to arouse women, and produce the necessary lubrication for penetration. We see that men dominate everywhere.

This week’s readings were incredibly interesting, especially Betty Friedman’s, “The Feminine Mystique” which is a book I’ve been wanting to read for a while now! Betty Friedman dissects what it meant to be a woman in the 1950s and the duties and perils it took to fill the role of the coveted “housewife”. A job many women still to this day idealize and wish to serve. However, with idealization comes disappointment in most occasions.
I didn’t realize the quote, “a woman’s work is never done” was until very recently. The duties of cleaning the house, raising the children, cooking, etc. are only part of what being a housewife entails in contemporary culture. Imagine being a woman in the 1950s, with a most likely emotionally unavailable husband, having to navigate this world knowing there are only a handful of career opportunities for you to choose from. In theory, being a housewife would be a no-brainer, most people are in the mindset that cooking and cleaning is a part of life regardless, might as well make it their “job”. In the text, Betty Friedman writes, “Their only dream was to be perfect wives and mothers; their highest ambition to have five children and a beautiful house, their only fight to get and keep husbands.” This particular quote really emphasizes the yearning for security, comfort, and beauty found in women who most of the times, had nothing else to fall back on in a time where they were barely respected if not perceived as a “quiet, well-mannered wife”. This reading made me better understand a book I am currently reading called, “Play It As It Lays” by Joan Didion. It chronicles the life of a woman in the 1960’s in vignettes of her life as a working actress in Hollywood and her yearning to just ‘be‘. She doesn’t want to be a housewife as well as a mother, she just wants to be a mother. She doesn’t want to sacrifice parts of herself for a man, but she wants a husband. Housewife culture is very much a give and take dynamic, there will rarely be a perfect balance between a self-identifying woman and a housewife. Despite the hard work, the title of a housewife has never been respected in society, especially in the 50s where men were considered the “breadwinners” of the family. The job of maintaining a clean house, as well as raising kids was deemed as “expected” of women. Having a beautiful house and well-mannered kids was something that most men loved to boast about to their friends, along with having a decent job, it was the pinnacle of success to have a beautiful home and family to go along with it, all while underestimating the work that comes along with it.
I really liked Mitch’s snapshot for the week as it detailed the struggles of a woman breaking away from her preconceived role in her society. This, however, rarely comes easy and without cost. So many women in the 50s and 60s especially had to check into mental hospitals for exhaustion and many other untreated mental illnesses. This wasn’t something that many wanted to share and was kept a shameful secret most of the time. Ultimately showing that the job of a housewife isn’t the “easier” role, many women lacked a sense of agency to even go out and do anything other than that.

 I found this week’s readings very interesting. The reading “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Friedan was one that I enjoyed reading and learning about.  In this reading, the author gave the reader an insight into what 15 years after WWII looked like for women and women’s roles. Throughout history, we have seen how the term housewife has evolved and with this reading, we are able to see the first definition of being a housewife. 

In this week’s reading, readers were able to have a better interpretation of what it meant to be a housewife back in the 1950s and how these women really felt. Being a housewife meant you had to stay home, take the kids to school, cook, clean, do laundry and make sure you keep your husband. This meant being submissive to your husband and doing whatever kept him happy. In this era, happiness was subjective, where happiness meant you were being the best housewife you could possibly be. The only dream was to be the perfect housewife and mother. These women were also not able to make major decisions for the house or for themselves. Women with other ambitions other than being a perfect housewife were frowned upon and women were taught to feel pity towards these ambitious women. While reading this I couldn’t think of anything else other than forced misogyny. These women were bringing other women down and wanted to stay submissive to their husbands forever. Fast forward to modern-day, a housewife now is a lot more optional, where they chose to stay at home as their husbands/partners provide for the family but they are able to have some say in decision making and are able to fend for themselves without it being an issue. Now, ambitions have somewhat changed and they vary by case, they still want to be the perfect wife and mother to the kids but they don’t do it out of fear from their husbands, they do it for themselves and personal goals. As women still compete with one another, especially housewives on who plays the role better, we have grown a lot out of bashing other women for wanting to go out and have careers and bring something else to the table. 

As we know, a housewife’s duties back in the mid to late 1900s were to cook and clean, and watch over the kids while the husband was at work. For this week, I added a snapshot of a meme of a woman saying “there are other rooms in the house?” I found this sad but funny. It is said that women were practically prohibited from doing anything else other than feeding their kids and husbands and making sure all chores were done. It saddens me that it took so long for women to realize their worth and realize that this was not the ‘happiness’ they thought they needed. Another post that caught my eye was one made by Sadira. In this post, there’s a woman saying “I don’t need rights – I have a kitchen”. This caught my attention because women really thought they had it all and were living lavishly while living into this pushed misogynistic idea of only obeying their male superiors – in this case, their husbands. I am so glad for the brave group of women who took a leap of faith and decided to go out and fight for women to have basic human rights again.