It is seriously sad to think that there is still millions out there who think that being a housewife is the “dream” job. When your place in the world is to breed and serve. Surely, they are not considering the silence they will have or that their opinions will matter. To have that be the American dream is frightening. Generationally it has been passed down to be the counterpart to a man. If you do this, you won’t find a husband. Be softer, kind, dumb and pretty. Have no say and let the man lead. I could think of a million other things id rather do than act in a way that would find me a husband or make me a mother. For that to be an aspiration to millions of women is pathetic and we need to change that generational gap. When searching for a snapshot for this week, I was shocked at how many right-wing based pages of meme’s I found on how being a housewife is a blessing and should be taken as a prize. This does nothing for the future. I do feel hopeful as the more recent generations are choosing to not procreate, whatever their reasonings. Hopefully this ends that mindset the patriarchy has pressed so deeply on millions. When it comes to house work and the liberations of, in my relationship it is split. I couldn’t imagine being any other way. If I was expected to do the “womanly duties” or have my partner say “show me, youre so much better at it” i would probably have a charge and that’s never good. I wouldn’t be with one that couldn’t provide sexually to my needs. I feel in the myth of the vaginal orgasm, men and women are taught that we need penetration and that provokes the vaginal orgasm. There are many ways to achieve orgasm. Personally, I must be emotionally or really physically stimulated for that to take place. Freud’s theories are theories and have been outdated for years. Those theories once again cater to men. Men are really bad at achieving female orgasm and I feel most women have experienced their first without a man and all by themselves. When looking at Shavoya’s snapshot it makes you think if that man in that picture has ever made a female orgasm? Probably not. His “housewife” probably wants to drop that cake right on his head. We can only hope going forward women will not settle for these social constructs that wear and oppress them. 

The image of a woman dedicating herself to her husband, home and children was the ideal image for men in the 1950’s. Woman weren’t treated as equals and instead treated as in home maids, caregivers, nannies with no form of compensation. In the excerpt from the reading “The Feminine Mystique” by Betty Friedan, Friedan states how women’s only worry, back then, was revolving around her home husband and children. Because they were told by their husbands to maintain their beauty and to take care of their homes, a majority of women were categorized as a housewife as an occupation. However, Friedan mentions how they longed for more out of their domestic lives. Friedan states “It was a strange stirring, a sense of dissatisfaction, a yearning that women suffered in the middle of the twentieth century in the United States. Each suburban wife struggled with it alone…she was afraid to ask even of herself the silent question – ‘Is this all?’” (1). Women having a career and being independent, seemed to be looked down on. Because the image of a career women wasn’t attractive, and this meant that men had no control over them. So-called “experts” would tell these women, that longing they feel is due to jealousy of men and their needs should revolve about fulfilling the role of a mother and a good wife. This expectation of women to be a household material and not her own person made it difficult for women to pursue careers. Even up to this day women continue being placed in second place. When Friedan states “A girl should not expect special privileges because of her sex, but neither should she “adjust” to prejudice and discrimination.” (3), Freidan is saying how women should be treated as equals with men but should not be humiliated and discriminated. Women should not “adjust” to their toxic workplace because “that’s what everyone does”, she should adjust in completing her career goals, but should never put her head down, to be given an opportunity. Furthermore, in the reading “The Politics of Housework” by Pat Mainardi, Mainardi mentions how women are conditioned from a young age that they are the ones responsible for the housework, while men are the ones who are meant to bring home the money. Mainardi mentions how men recognize that housework is not fun and will bring up excuses as to what they will do and what they won’t do, when it revolves around housework. Such as doing certain once a month jobs, while leaving the daily chores up to women. Mainardi mentions “‘I hate it more than you. You don’t mind it so much.’ MEANING: Housework is garbage work. It’s the worst crap I’ve ever done. It’s degrading and humiliating for someone of my intelligence to do it. But for someone of your intelligence…” (3).  This example is meant to demonstrate that men don’t believe they have to work in their home, because it not up to them to clean and cook, domestic styles just don’t fit within their toxic masculinity. However, for women, men believe they were made to clean up after them. The snapshot by Caitlyn Howell, is a perfect image as to how these men would think. They view women as a homeworker, who takes care and cleans up after them, they view women as their mothers and not as their wives.

Looking back this is what people , mostly men, really thought a woman wanted and would be satisfied with. Being home cooking, cleaning , raising the kids, that’s what their life consisted of, that is what they were born to do, their sole purpose. Later they were surprised when women wanted more, and wanted to be treated fairly and just. In some cases women were forced to stay in unhappy, abusive, toxic marriages because of the sole purpose that they relied on their husbands. Men had the power, they brought home the money, they were a woman’s life line. Without a husband you had nothing. No surprise here that women wanted out. Women wanted to pursue their own dreams and goals. Looking to present day women are waiting and committing,getting married later in their life. This is because they want to achieve goals before they settle down. That’s not to say you can’t have the best of both worlds. There are women  who do get married, have a family, and still have a career. But this was not an option for women in the past. Something we might overlook is LQBTQ women during those times. Not only were they forced to hide who they truly are. But having to marry someone who they are not in love with nor attracted to. Not being able to express who they truly are, love who they really want, looking their inner self in a cage at the sake of losing it all. 

The feminine mystique I think was everything women were thinking and talking about put into one piece of writing. It has transcended from generation to generation and is still being read and analyzed till this day. This is because this piece genuinely  spoke to women . Women are more than a housewife, more than a stay at home mother. Men are not the only ones who get all the power and glory. There are constant barriers stacked up against women , pushing them back. But women continue to fight and push back. There has been progress made but it’s not enough. Not until the idea and notion that women are just born to be caregivers and housewives is eradicated. We know that there is so much out there we can do , but in other countries women don’t have the same luxury.It is for that same reason that the job is still not done. It’s one thing to want to stay home and raise the kids and what not, the problem is that women were not given the option to do so but rather forced to do so. This was the only thing they had. When women started talking to one another and admitting that they are unhappy , that they wanted more, that this is the way everyone felt , they took action. It’s moments like these that make history. We can sit back and compare a woman’s life then and now. Yes progress has been made but there is still work that has to be done. From women in STEM making strides to be a part of “male dominated” jobs, to women not wanting to get married or simply waiting, to women putting themselves and their goals first.

The feminine mystique describes a powerful message about the importance of women constantly being dissatisfied. The idea that women could find fulfillment through housework, marriage and other things of the sort has become normalized for years and years. Simply assuming women have no desire for higher education or to participate in a career field is presumably the thought departing women from men. Throughout time, this term has developed differently in several ways however many people and men believe this objective still applies. Friedan maintained her critique and voiced her opinion on the feminine mystique affecting women personally due to identity being massive through career and success. This expectation has been studied and women have always been looked at to perform feminine motherly activities, while men handled the bigger jobs and participated in masculine fields. She defended her claim with statistics that illustrated the feminine mystique. 

The media and people often perpetuate the feminine mystique to be true, as many may continue to believe nurturing feminine activities are for women and the masculine jobs are for men. Furthermore, according to the article, it articulates the idea that women would be happily satisfied as a housewife and mother, only concerned about her husband, children and home. It also states fifteen years after World War II, the mystique of feminine fulfillment became the self-perpetuating core of contemporary American culture as women lived the picture perfect life of kissing their husbands goodbye and doing chores around the house. For over many years, women began to question their worth and question the intention of their tasks, yearning for more and feeling neglected in the bigger fields. This problem was unspoken of and for a long time, no one did anything about it because of how normalized it became. Being raised and brought up as women centuries ago, that’s all you were taught to be. A simple housewife, cleaning after your husband and children and how to keep them from dying young and their sons from growing into delinquents. 

This idea had a major impact and spoke levels, to this day women are still fighting to break the barrier that marriage and children is sufficient enough to make a woman happy. More and more women have come forward being in these situations and not feeling happy at all, as the video states. Women have constantly been trying to figure out how exactly to fulfill their needs and break out of this idea that has always been so heavily influenced. There are still many battles to fight for women and their equality in America and these issues should no longer be foreshadowed or be ignored. Men shy away from women working in the stronger fields alongside everyone else due to fear of competition. If women continue the idea of being housewives and working inside the house, as men work outside, there would be no “competition.” In our society, many have voiced their concern and empathy towards this topic and it is still something women face everyday, where people stereotype them to do house work and work in the kitchen constantly but that is not the case and should have never been.

When I think of a housewife I think about a stay at home mom who is responsible for taking care of the house and doing chores. Whether that’s cleaning, cooking, doing laundry, making sure that the house has everything it needs and taking care of the kids throughout the day. However, it didn’t occur to me that some of these women gave up on their careers and things they wanted to do in life to be this person that their husband and kids need. Many lose themselves while trying to be this perfect mother and wife. After reading The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan, society’s role in this was clear. It was stated how “For over fifteen years there was no word of this yearning in the millions of words written about women, for women, in all the columns, books and articles by experts telling women their role was to seek fulfillment as wives and mothers…. Experts told them how to catch a man and keep him,  how to breastfeed children and handle their toilet training, how to cope with sibling rivalry and adolescent rebellion;” (Friedan). The word “yearning” was used to describe how there has been no word of women longing for something else. The fact that this whole thing was based on experts educating women on how to keep a man and being a mom shows how much they think that’s all that should be important to a woman. What about her goals? Her mental health? And her life outside of the house? Women have been told all their life how they should carry themselves, what they need to learn how to do and what they can’t do. With no room left for what they want. Their voice and dreams matter just as much as a man. It’s sad that it’s years later and women are still having these same problems.

Marams’ snapshot stood out to me because it showed how much a housewife actually has to do around the house by themselves. Which showed me that it actually is a full time job, I never saw it in this way because they aren’t getting paid to do it but it takes a lot of time and energy. Not only that but it showed what it would look like if men helped out with the load, such as helping clean, organize the house and much more which I thought was interesting. Seeing how gender roles were eliminated showed a different perspective which I believe to be good. Pat Mainardi talked more on this in The Politics of Housework and gave examples of how men would respond to this and what they really meant. One response would be “Housework is too trivial to even talk about.” MEANING: It’s even more trivial to do. Housework is beneath my status. My purpose in life is to deal with matters of significance. Yours is to deal with matters of insignificance. You should do the housework.” (Mainardi, 3). Housework is seen as unimportant to men which is why they believe women should do it. Implying that women cannot handle important and much more valuable tasks. Which just shows how little men think of women even when they are doing the most. This idea that housework isnt important shows how unappreciative some men are, especially those with wives as they continue to belittle women and underestimate them.

The post made by Shavoya Easy for this assignment in my opinion perfectly pictures the typical American household in the 20th century. The post shows a husband who is the “money maker” of the household since he is in his office clothes still and he is relaxing on his sofa while reading the daily newspaper. In his eyes and in the family’s eyes he is the focal point of everyone’s lives because of the actions others are doing for him. The son is holding another newspaper which I am assuming is to switch out whenever he is done reading the one he has in his hand and the child is also lighting the dad’s tobacco pipe. The mother is holding a plate of cake which I am assuming she made and she is also wearing a maid outfit which represents how she is taking care of all of the housework a paid maid would do. She is submissive to the man of the household and while he is away “working harder than anyone else”, the mother is in charge of taking care of the children, cleaning, cooking, etc. Even the family dog is assisting the leisure of the husband by changing his shoes. The family’s job is to surround themselves around the husband and make sure the husband’s only job is to work and relax when they get home. It completely undermines every other person’s day-to-day hard work and stress. Not to say one person’s stress is more than another however, mothers are told that their job is not hard enough since they do not have to “go to work”. It makes women obtain a mindset that they are only successful individuals if they submit themselves to the needs of men. Also generating the idea that, if a man does not fall in love with her or he cannot fully support her financially she is an embarrassment to the American Dream. It’s a mindset that still exists to this day and has created many forms of misogyny within many cultures (that I have seen myself). For example, in one of my cultural backgrounds (Mexican), the women’s only job is to give up their education, which could be even before graduating high school, give birth to their children, and tend to all of their needs on their own. When dinner is made, the food must be brought to the husband by the wife and the husband always eats first since they are the ones bringing in the money. Whatever dreams and aspirations women had, were forced to take them down and abandon all dreams regardless of anything. This is a lifestyle that is within many cultures around the globe and not only in American, and it makes it incredibly hard for women to make it into a successful career whether it is politics, business, architecture, etc. because men have created this idea that women are to be the submissive ones and have no true strengths beside being the caregiver. I can only speak on behalf of my experience but the women that I know today who come from immigrant families are struggling to be the change because of their parents and forcing them to fit into one category. Friends I know who are a part of the LGBTQ+ community are not accepted by their families because they will not marry a man and bear their own children. Newer generations are breaking these cultural barriers that have been passed down for centuries but at a cost that some of their families do not understand this new lifestyle and it is heartbreaking. We do not live in a world where women’s dreams, rights, and strength is to be denied. Everyone regardless of gender, sexuality, race, socio-economic status deserves equal rights and should never fit into an ideology that forces them into one category where mobility does not exist. It is understandable that this lifestyle may have existed before for centuries but it does not mean it is correct and the morally humane way to live and treat others. We live in a decade (more than ever) where we are correcting past mistakes and hopefully future generations will solve the mistakes we have made.

A housewife is a woman who is responsible for operating or managing her family’s household, including caring for her children, purchasing, cooking, and storing food for the family, and purchasing daily necessities.

Some argue that there are no longer any “traditional” housewives or stay-at-home moms. We are all unique individuals with unique lifestyles and circumstances. Many of us have never worked outside of the home, while others have. Most of us are well educated, with biochemists, neuroscientists, doctors, lawyers, and other professionals among us. However, I believe that housewives still exist.

In 2021, Mississippi led the list of states with the highest number of stay-at-home parents. One parent stays at home with their children in 6.5 percent of families in the Magnolia State. Delaware finished in second with 5.6 percent, Texas third with 3.5 percent, and North Carolina fourth with 3.5 percent (3.4 percent).