I think the sentences from the student is too general, it didn’t show any specific detail to provide what did author really trying to say. The sentence is ineffective because the student should give some details to let the reader get related to the story, but the student only post out his own opinion without any details.
If I am going to rewrite the sentences, I will try to provide more details from the story, like how did the main character felt heartbreak after he went to the market and how did he realize the relationship between him and the girl. to provide these details will help reader get into the story and not to confused about why did character grown up in one night.
2 thoughts on “Discussion 4 Ye Fang”
Hi Ye, I agree with you, adding specific details from the story like how the main character felt heartbroken after visiting the market and how he realized his relationship with the girl, would help readers connect with the narrative and understand the character’s growth in “Araby” by James Joyce. This would make the essay more engaging and clear for the reader.
Ye, the prompt asks you to write your own sentence to show how to improve on the one given. Also, please, please, please post correctly. Never choose anything in the box that reads “Category Sticky.” Leave that box as it is. It will say “Select a category.” Leave it like that. Click here for screenshot.