The sentence from the student’s essay is too vague, by just stating that the story examines the narrator and the complexity of human condition doesn’t give insight as to how that is being done. For starters we know the narrator is anonymous and they don’t tell us how the narrators acts or even displays any signs of his complex actions. I would instead say The story “Araby” illustrates how a crush or longing for someone creates a sense of obsession. In the story the narrator shows cases of obsession and stalking. “I ran to the hall, seized my books and followed her. I kept her brown figure always in my eye and, when we came near the point at which our ways diverged, I quickened my pace and passed her.” – Araby. This quote is significant because it shows the lengths the narrator went to, to be in her presence. Another example would be caring so much that he gave his hopes up going to the Bazaar to give her a gift.
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2 thoughts on “Nathalie Joseph Discussion 4”
Nathalie, your comments are very good. I think your new sentence needs just a little tweaking. Remember you are writing about a specific person in a specific story. So your sentence should indicate that the crush or longing for someone creates a sense of obsession in the adolescent narrator (or something like that). Your choice of quote to illustrate the boy’s obsession is very well chosen.
Hey Nathalie, I agree the student’s sentence is vague, I feel like it was just listing off what the student is going to talk about in the essay instead of something that will catch the readers attention and make them want to continue reading their essay. “Araby” does illustrate the idea of the feeling of love becoming into something toxic for example like you said “how a crush or longing for someone creates a sense of obsession”