My thoughts on the reading, “Beyond the gender Binary” teaches us that you don’t have to understand what it means for someone to be non-binary to respect them. Some people have not  heard a lot about non-binary gender or have trouble understanding them, and that’s okay. You can’t always go by what people want to assume just because you’re confused or don’t consider yourself male or female, you’re fine just being yourself, and don’t let people pull you down. You’re gonna have people judge you for who you are no matter what. You’re not here to please everyone but to show people how you want to be viewed. In the reading alok mentioned “ Everyone thinks that since we “made a choice” to look like that,” we are bringing it upon ourselves”.(pg12). Something about this is people are gonna be this and that the next time. People can be confused and might think they made a choice but really they can change that up. It reminds me of one time when my own cousin was so confused about whether he fell in that category of him being a male and I remember this one time some lady went up to him and asked him why he was dressed up the way he was dressed. Now my cousin was dressed as a woman, he has told me that he liked the style of clothing women had. Having someone that we don’t even know ask that to my cousin in some way made me feel bad for my cousin you have people that you don’t even know what a person is going through and coming at them like that is just disrespectful and that everyone should be respected and not be disrespected just because they are different. It’s about time that people should open their eyes and see that everyone is different and no need to judge someone because what they wear bothers you or maybe you’re curious. Some people just have to accept what people want to wear or what they identify themselves as even if it bothers them.

I’m really happy these are the articles this week. I always appreciate a discussion on gender, and I’ve always been curious about the history of feminism. It’s really a shame that people choose to hold onto their perception of feminism, as it is almost always way off base. I found it really interesting how the different forms of feminism weren’t accepted by all feminists and that a lack of common understanding is one of the big reasons that people have a hard time getting behind it. It’s definitely true that institutionalized women’s studies are a big help in being able to truly talk about this without so much obstruction. It’s sad that when black women and other women of color would bring up the topic of race, it would get backlash. Unfortunately, that’s not too surprising, but I feel that we should go back and reflect on a lot of these things, to appropriately show our respect for the women who did just as much if not more than white women in contributing to feminism. It was also nice to learn that feminism would even tackle sexist characters and ideas in books. I feel like we still see things like this today in shows, podcasts, and many other forms of media. These are definitely things that we should critique as it’s still so present. Overall I really like the articles this week, I plan on saving them and revisiting them in the future!

Before reading ” beyond the gender binary” by Alok void-Menon, I thought I had a good understanding of the difficulties and struggles of gender fluidity, but there is much more to it. This reading was eye-opening and gave you a first-person point of the discrimination they face. Apart from the changes being made in social events, restaurants, and workplaces, acknowledgment is huge. Alok spoke about not having the luxury of being and instead of being seen as just pretending or acting. Their gender is nothing more than just something they can take off. this is something that I didn’t think about before. I knew that people could discriminate and treat others unfairly. Still, society acts as if their choice is nothing more than makeup they can take off. doing this takes away the seriousness of the matter and pushes us away from accepting change. While reading, I’ve also learned that” changes ” also play a big factor in accepting gender fluidity. Alok talks about how discrimination against gender non-conforming people happens because the system rewards conformity and not creativity. Society fears most is chance, when people step up and try to do anything that isn’t the norm. When speaking about how to change and what is considered the norm, Alok gives multiple examples of how society tries to downplay the lack of acceptance and transform today’s world. Examples include dismissal and saying that it’s common sense that there are only two genders. inconvenience, rather than trying to understand, people will just try to tolerate it. biology, that’s whatever science says is correct and is the answer to everything. finally, the slippery slope, that is gender fluidity becomes the norm the end result will lead to only and results, after reading through the book, I’ve learned

Reading from the excerpt Beyond the Gender Binary, by Alok Vaid Manon really helped me understand what people who identify as different genders have to endure. People shouldn’t ask questions about why someone is wearing something unless they are genuinely curious and don’t have any knowledge about the topic of identifying as a specific gender. We unfortunately live in a society where there is stereotypes of what a man or woman should wear but people shouldn’t care about how someone’s desires to dress because it isn’t affecting that person in any way, shape, or form. Many people tend to talk about people who are gender binary and/or gender fluid, but always seem to never want to interact with them or have conversations about what makes them feel a certain way towards people who identify differently. Unfortunately for several years, there has been many conflicts targeting gender nonconforming people like reporting them using bathrooms, banning transgender athletes in sports in high school, and taking away their access to places that are “open“ to the public. The fact that the Department of Justice claimed that trans and gender nonconforming workers aren’t protected by the civil rights law like the rest of the human citizens are is appalling and sad. We shouldn’t live in a world where because of what you identify as, you have certain rights revoked from you. Everyone should be treated the same no matter what you wear, how you talk, what you like, or what you look like. At the end of the day, we are all human and all have feelings so we should be considerate of others feelings and make them feel included even if they feel different.

Antione Malave Reading reflection 2.

As entertained i was at Alok’s inquisitive look at Gender roles. He was so charismatic when discussing the ways we should all be talking because it would respectful . Or how we could all be something much more then a gender . As i stated in the last reflection i don’t see the importance of knowing of knowing what you identify yourself with before i even know your name . That is something private that i really could care less about . I care about your character not which cartoon pajamas you sleep in. I honestly don’t and the fact that i don’t care somehow allows me to be pigeon holed into a space where me saying i don’t care equates to trans, binary gender hate, misogyny, anti feminism or anti reoperations or whatever buzz word you could apply. I also love how essentially Alok is saying it should be like this and no other way else. That basically leaves little if no room for debate or discussion which can potentially be problematic. Even thou i didn’t agree with what was said. I do enjoy how passionate ALok was speaking about a subject that allot of people wont even touch so openly and freely without restraint. I feel that for there to be changes and things made clear there needs to be open dialogue without finger pointing or sneering at another persons opinions that are not your own

Reading “Beyond the Gender Binary” was a good read. More than anything for me it made me sad. Sad because society or the majority of just refuses to except people doing and expressing themselves without boundaries. We talk about progression in the world and it is clearly a selective progression. Alok recounts his childhood experiences and how many of them affected his conscious when making choices that would not coincide with the gender norms society expects from a boy/man. He points out how society refuses to let the gender non-conforming individuals just be. It is almost as if society is harassing those who don’t live up to what is expected in “normal society”, but who are we to say what is normal, honestly. It’s like people encourage you to be yourself but NOT if it does not conform with what the majority says. Truth be told there were likely many people who just did not know how to label themselves or identify the feelings they were experiencing when not identifying with their given genders at birth- well before all the LGBTQ language and community was around. They sat in secret wishing to be someone else. The difference now is people are speaking up and saying this is me, this is how I identify and society cannot handle it. Acceptance and normality go hand in hand, maybe if the world were more accepting of the individuals living beyond the gender binary a lot would not seem so out of the ordinary it would be a part of the ordinary!!

I enjoyed this week’s reading to the point that I want to read the entire book. Alok Vaid Manon managed to put into words and answer some of my questions that kept me from fully accepting the abstract and fluid nature of gender. As a science-minded person with biology as an intended major, I was concerned with how our modern definition of gender interacts with biological sex and the behavior of humans based on that. I have an indisputable belief in the huge role of our hormones and brain activity on the way we act and feel, yet I also genuinely support the idea of gender identity as something totally separate from your chromosomes. Here’s one quote from Aloc’s book that relieved me: “Societal beliefs about sex affect what questions scientists ask and the knowledge they gain.” And this is true of any research – the way you shape the question will affect the outcome.

Another thing that I loved about the reading is the eye-opening facts about the existing problems of gender diversity. Because I’ve never lived anywhere else except New York, it is hard for me to perceive the real struggle of non-binary and transgender people, because there’s less judgement and violence addressed towards them in the city. Here everyone either minds their business or praises you for being different. For that reason I often felt like this is an already resolved issue and everyone is accepted. For the longest time I did not understand why people still talk so much about it. Yet if I step out of my mind’s comfort zone just a little bit, I can still recall that many post-soviet countries, where I’m from, still think of “transgender,” as something fundamentally wrong and negative, while the concept of being non-binary is almost not present. I also learned from Aloc’s book about obvious discrimination and hate existing in many U.S states. For example, Texas proposing financial compensation for reporting transgender people using the restroom or Department of Justice announcing that trans and gender non-conforming workers are not protected by civil right law. Even if I consider my own feelings, I can confess about the discomfort of sharing my gender fluidity with people who know me.

The reading excerpts from “Beyond the Gender Binary” by Alok Vaid Manon touches base on gender by going into depth about conformity, fluidity, and experiences Alok has been through as an individual who identifies as nonbinary in society. Throughout reading the excerpts I learned more about the experiences one goes through when living in society as someone who identifies as nonbinary. However, I also learned more about gender as a whole and how the continuous evolution of the topic gender hasn’t quite fully been accepted in society, nor has society grasped the whole subject of gender and the ideas within that subject. We can think of gender as the root of a tree and the more we learn about different ways others associate with gender, the tree will continue to grow with different branches. Therefore, when we create more space for others when it comes to identifying with gender, the concept  of gender as a whole will continue to grow and evolve. An important topic I learned from the text is the idea that the gender system as a whole is not only outdated but has been the cause of a lot of problems in society today. Alok tries to open us up to the ideology that the whole gender system has constantly found ways to exclude individuals who don’t label or identify themselves simply as just a male or a female. Alok goes into detail about the gender binary and how it is set up for people to fail; this also includes individuals like me and you. You may be thinking, what is the gender binary? The gender binary is a system of gender classification in which all people are categorized as being either male or female. Alok describes the gender binary system as being more concerned with gender norms than it is with updating and educating the system on the different categories of gender individuals associate themselves with that isn’t just a male or a female. Alok states, “we are led to believe that there are only two genders, ‘man’  and ‘woman’, and these genders are narrow, separate, and opposite. We are taught from a very young age that this is how things have always been and this is the only way to live.” This statement resonated with me because growing up my parents were separated and I lived with my mom but I visited my dad every weekend and during the summertime. Even though I identify myself as a woman I have always liked dressing like a tomboy as well as playing video games and playing sports. My mom was always against me enjoying and dressing as what was called “boyish” things. I was always taught from my mom that boys can only like boy things such as sports, wrestling, and the color blue; and girls like me can only like girl things such as the color pink, barbie dolls, playing dress-up, and make-up. My mom, without realizing it, made me feel ashamed for enjoying things that I was taught were only specifically meant for boys. Gender was distinctly separated in my household and she made sure that I understood that anything other than associating as a girl or being interested in “girly” things was never to be tolerated or talked about nor would it ever be accepted in her home. I feel as though as society continues to evolve; moving forward we should take the initiative to change the gender binary system so it is more inclusive to all who don’t associate themselves in the most simplest way as a male or female but make it inclusive to those who associate themselves in other ways we may not even know of yet. It is important to include everyone in the conversation of gender so it is fair and comprehensive. Another important topic I learned throughout the excerpts by Alok is the fact that power and control both contribute to the broken gender binary system and overall the world as a whole. With control people can gain power and with power people can continuously control the narrative and conversation of gender without letting outsiders give their input and suggestions. Alok states, “Arguments against gender non-conforming people are about maintaining power and control.” This is a powerful statement because it helps us to understand that when we allow society to continuously control the conversation about gender, then we are allowing the binary norm system to maintain the power and control they have over the ideology of gender and what terms we use to associate gender with. If we want the binary norm to evolve and become more inclusive and considerate to all individuals in the world, then we need to regain the power and control back to steer the direction of our own narratives; making sure everyone’s voice is heard and everyone is seen and accepted once and for all. Lastly, a third important topic I learned throughout Alok’s excerpts is another strategy that people use to make the gender binary system seem like a given instead of a decision; dismissal. Alok states, “In order to even get a seat at the table, people have to believe that you exist.” Another powerful and impactful statement made by Alok because it acknowledges the fact that people still refuse to acknowledge that gender non-conforming people exist.

After reading the excerpts from Alok’s book, I felt bad. I never realized the privilege I have as a cis-gendered female. The fact that Alok has to explain themselves to people is outrageous. It’s crazy that we’ve come so far, but people still aren’t tolerant towards others that don’t look or act like them. I think it’s time that we accepted people for who they are. In the dismissal chapter, where Alok had a quote for each paragraph, it reminded me of Jules from Euphoria. In the first episode, she was at Nate’s party and wasn’t doing anything. Then he started bothering her for no reason whatsoever. He claimed she wanted attention for how she looked. He was referring to her being transgender. I’ve seen situations like this happen so frequently. I think something I really have to do after reading these excerpts is stand up to those ignorant people who take pride in shaming others for being themselves. If we all started standing up for one another, the world would be a better place. The scariest part of it all, in my opinion, is that you can never act a certain way in these situations because you never know how the person will react. Many people are so outraged by the way non-binary people live their lives that they resort to violence. I thought it was an older generation thing, but I was surprised to hear a popular guy ask another guy how many genders he thought there were in my first week of junior year. And when the popular guy said 2, he smiled and said, “Good, we can be friends then.” It was completely random. I don’t know why people are so fixated on the lifestyles that other people live.