I think moving beyond the gender binary means recognizing the harmful gender norms that have been established and choosing to be yourself in every way possible. Alok says, “We wear pantsuits even when it’s blisteringly hot outside, even though skirts would be far more practical.” Alok also mentions how many of us worry that liking certain things will make us look feminine or masculine. Gender norms have prevented us from being our true selves. People are afraid of being themselves because they fear being judged. So I think the outcome of all this is that we often see people projecting their inability to be themselves onto children and those around them.

If I am being honest, I don’t think I really go against gender norms. Well, not anymore. I remember, as a child, I used to describe my gender as free-spirited. At that time, it meant I could be both. I wanted both characteristics. Men were seen as strong and courageous, and women were seen as beautiful and delicate. I felt like I sat exactly in the middle. I grew up reading a lot about kings and queens, and while queens have contributed so much. Kings had the most power. Kings went to war and made important decisions. I think it was after reading about powerful monarchs that I decided I wanted to be a king rather than a queen for a while. I remember constantly arguing with friends while playing because they said I couldn’t be a king because I was a girl. Things have changed a lot since then. I definitely fit more into gender norms. I found myself wanting to feel and look more feminine after puberty. I’ve gotten into the habit of mostly wearing dresses. I started to wear makeup, and now I carry purses. My younger self would probably be upset with me. But I see nothing wrong with trying something new. In recent years, I’ve read a lot about powerful women who weren’t in the books I read as a kid. For a while, I thought I was weak because I was beginning to like traditional feminine things. But I know now that I can be a strong, powerful woman, even in a dress. I may not go against gender norms in my own life, but I do try to encourage others to be themselves. For example, I come from a traditional Jamaican family and I have a cousin who’s a kid, so naturally he’s curious about everything, including my doll collection. So when I babysit, I let him be himself. We play hand games, and I let him watch “girly shows” and play with my dolls. In my opinion, I feel like in terms of gender expression, the world appears to be much harsher on men. My family allowed me to have my moment of finding myself. But the boys in my family don’t quite have that luxury. Everything is seen as “gay”. Being gay isn’t a bad thing, but to my family it is. There’s the pressure that they can’t cry or they’ll look like girls. I think it all starts at a young age. It’s a cycle of self-hatred being projected onto others because they can’t be themselves.

I think Bell Hooks meant that feminism isn’t just a movement for gender equality. It’s a movement that wishes to rid the world of all discrimination and to respect others as well. When Hooks says “oppression,” I believe she means “ending oppression for everyone.” This movement is supposed to be inclusive and beneficial to all. 

This definition is different from what I have known of feminism so far. If I am being honest, I’ve heard plenty of negative things about feminism from many people in my life and across the media. To those around me, feminists stereotypically hate men and are very sensitive. I think the portrayal of feminists on television furthers this stereotype. The thing about stereotypes is that when they are depicted on television, they encourage ignorance towards certain groups. I think this also affects children, because kids are easily influenced. Then those kids grow up thinking feminism is bad. In high school, it wasn’t cool to be one. When speaking up about certain things, I found myself constantly saying to friends, “not to be a total feminist but…” There’s also the fact that many white feminists in the past were opposed to black people getting the right to vote before them. Many of which pursued ways to block us from advancing. Due to that, feminism gets a bad reputation in most black communities because that movement was never really “for us”. After reading this essay, I realized that many modern feminists actually believe in the rights of black women. The movement may have had a few racist people in the past, but some things have changed, and the movement seems a lot more inclusive. 

I think “Sex and Gender 101” gave me a lot more insight. I knew there was a difference. And lately, for a while now, I’ve noticed when filling out forms they ask you for your sex and your gender. There are plenty of people who aren’t aware of the difference, which makes them prone to misgendering others. Something I found interesting is when the article said “gender plays into how most children are treated and how they learn what is expected of their gender and what is not…” I agree with this quote and feel it plays a huge part in toxic masculinity and the “pick me” culture. So much could be said about how these stereotypes affect kids growing up, but one thing is for sure: many feel insecure about their sex as they go into their adult years. Most parents mean no harm when projecting these stereotypes onto their children, but it’s something that should change.

My name is Ashanti Prendergast. This is my fourth semester at BMCC. I’m a communications major. I’m not sure what I wanna do in the future but if I had to narrow it down I’d either be a broadcast journalist or a creative director at an advertising agency. I think the media gets a lot of hate for being harmful and exploitative but it can be good. Most importantly I’ve found that there is a lack of black women in the media. It became very discouraging but for there to be representation we must create it. So for whichever path I choose, I want to help fellow black students get into the field. I’m from Queens, New York. I’ve lived here my whole life but most of my family lives in jamaica so I find myself visiting constantly. I love to travel. I’ve only ever been to Jamaica but I’m hoping that after I graduate I can take some time to travel across the world. I’ve always wanted to go to Paris. That’s my dream destination. In my spare time, I like to read, practice my french, and take walks in different areas. I dislike math, close-minded people, and being stuck in one place for too long.

I took this class because it was recommended to me. I don’t know what to expect if I’m being honest. But I hope to learn more about the revolutions that took place to get us where we are today. I also hope we get to touch upon the women’s liberation movement in the 70s. I watched a lot of documentaries about it in high school and I know how impactful it became especially regarding women’s fashion. And a film I’d love to discuss is 2019’s Bombshell. It’s about 3 different women working at fox news who faced sexual harassment from their boss. What drew me in about this film was the trailer. It left me feeling anxious, intrigued, and interested. Another thing I hope we discuss is the AlRawabi School for Girls. It’s about a girl who decides to take revenge on her bullies. It tackles sexual harassment, abuse, assault, and the harsh treatment of women. It’s a limited series on Netflix but it touches upon so many different important topics. I recommend it as a must-watch. As for books I recommend the confessions of a video vixen by Karinne Steffans. It details the life of a video vixen in the early 2000s and how the men in the industry treated her.